


𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ━━ the rain ¹

by illydreamer



Category: The Rain (TV 2018)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:54:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 24,783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27807145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/illydreamer/pseuds/illydreamer
Summary: .｡* ☾.*.｡ 𝐬𝐤𝐲𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐞❝𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘭𝘺 𝘨𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺. 𝘪𝘵 𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘰𝘧 𝘶𝘴, 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘭𝘺 𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘷𝘪𝘷𝘦 ❞☆.｡.:* 𝐑𝐀𝐒𝐌𝐔𝐒 𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐄𝐍 .｡.:*☆⤷   in which a troubled girl, who'sfelt like she's been alone herwhole life and has lost everything,finds her true family even thoughthe darkness that lingers within itmay be it's end𝗯𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝗴𝗻 𝘀𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗲𝘀𝗻𝗲𝘁𝗳𝗹𝗶𝘅'𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗿𝗮𝗶𝗻 | 𝗿𝗮𝘀𝗺𝘂𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗻𝘀𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝗼𝗻𝗲©𝗶𝗹𝗹𝘆𝗱𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗿
Relationships: Rasmus Andersen/Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 4





	1. 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄.

  
  
  
╔═══ ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ═══╗

𝐄𝐏𝐈𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐏𝐇

╚═══ ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ═══╝

  
**"** 𝘿𝙖𝙧𝙠𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙣𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙧𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙡𝙮𝙜𝙤𝙚𝙨𝙖𝙬𝙖𝙮 **.** 𝙄𝙩𝙡𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙞𝙣𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙤𝙛𝙪𝙨 **,** 𝙞𝙩 **'** 𝙨𝙤𝙣𝙡𝙮𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩𝙩𝙧𝙪𝙡𝙮𝙚𝙢𝙗𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙚𝙞𝙩𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩𝙨𝙪𝙧𝙫𝙞𝙫𝙚 **"**

╔═══ ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ═══╗

𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘

╚═══ ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ═══╝

in which a troubled girl, who's felt like she's been alone her whole life and has lost everything, finds her true family even though the darkness that lingers within it may be it's end

╔═══ ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ═══╗

𝐂𝐀𝐒𝐓

╚═══ ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ═══╝  
  


  
*+:｡.｡ 𝘚𝘺𝘥𝘯𝘦𝘺 𝘗𝘢𝘳𝘬 𝘢𝘴 𝘒𝘢𝘪 𝘔𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘦𝘴𝘰𝘯 ｡.｡:+*

 ** _"_** 𝗜 ** _'_** 𝘃𝗲𝗯𝗲𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗹𝗼𝘀𝗲𝘁𝗼𝗱𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗵𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗮𝗻𝘆𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗺𝘆𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲  
𝗜 ** _'_** 𝗺𝗻𝗼𝘁𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗲𝗶𝘁𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻𝗳𝗮𝘇𝗲𝘀𝗺𝗲𝗮𝗻𝘆𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 ** _._**  
𝗕𝘂𝘁𝗜 ** _'_** 𝗹𝗹𝗯𝗲𝗱𝗮𝗺𝗻𝗲𝗱𝗶𝗳𝘆𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗸𝗜 ** _'_** 𝗺𝗴𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗮𝗹𝗲𝘁𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗱𝗶𝗲 ** _."._**

  
*+:｡.｡ 𝘓𝘶𝘤𝘢𝘴 𝘓𝘺𝘯𝘨𝘨𝘢𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘛ø𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘴 𝘙𝘢𝘴𝘮𝘶𝘴   
𝘈𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘯 ｡.｡:+*

 **"** 𝗔𝗹𝗹𝗜𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗱𝘄𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗼𝘀𝗲𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘀𝗸𝘆𝗯𝘂𝘁𝗜  
****𝗻𝗼𝘄𝗜𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹𝗶𝘇𝗲𝗱𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘀𝗸𝘆𝘄𝗮𝘀𝘆𝗼𝘂 **."**

∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐘𝐎𝐍𝐄 𝐄𝐋𝐒𝐄 𝐀𝐒 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐈𝐑 𝐑𝐄𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐕𝐄 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒  
  


∘₊✧──────✧₊∘  
  


╔═══ ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ═══╗

𝐒𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐃𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐊

╚═══ ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ═══╝

★| 𝚒𝚗𝚝𝚎𝚛𝚕𝚞𝚍𝚎 : 𝚜𝚑𝚊𝚍𝚘𝚠 — bts   
★| 𝚜𝚙𝚊𝚗𝚒𝚜𝚑 𝚜𝚊𝚑𝚊𝚛𝚊 — foals   
★| 𝚌𝚑𝚊𝚜𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚌𝚊𝚛𝚜 — snow patrol   
★| 𝚖𝚘𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚗 𝚕𝚘𝚗𝚎𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚜 — lauv   
★| 𝚛𝚒𝚙 𝟸 𝚖𝚢 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚝𝚑 — the neighborhood   
★| 𝚜𝚝𝚘𝚌𝚔𝚑𝚘𝚕𝚖 𝚜𝚢𝚗𝚍𝚛𝚘𝚖𝚎 — one direction   
★| 𝚙𝚕𝚊𝚢 𝚍𝚊𝚝𝚎 — melanie martinez  
★| 𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚖𝚜 — bazzi   
★| 𝚗𝚞𝚖𝚋 𝚝𝚘 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕𝚒𝚗𝚐 — chase atlantic   
★| 𝚊𝚏𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚛𝚜 — the weekend  
★| 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚛𝚝𝚋𝚎𝚊𝚝 — bts  
★| 𝚖𝚒𝚜𝚎𝚛𝚢 — maroon 5  
★| 𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚗𝚐 — one direction   
★| 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚖𝚘𝚟𝚒𝚎𝚜 — nightly  
★| 𝚒 𝚝𝚑𝚒𝚗𝚔 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚌𝚘𝚘𝚕 — guardin   
★| 𝚎𝚗𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑 𝚏𝚘𝚛 𝚢𝚘𝚞 — lani rose  
★| 𝚏𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚔 𝚜𝚑𝚘𝚠 — sub urban   
★| 𝚜𝚞𝚗𝚜𝚎𝚝 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎𝚛 — petit biscuit   
★| 𝚠𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠 — two door cinema club  
★| 𝚔𝚒𝚜𝚜𝚒𝚗 𝚞 — miranda cosgrove   
★| 𝚏𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛 𝚍𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚖 — mxmtoon   
★| 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚗𝚒𝚐𝚑𝚝 𝚠𝚎 𝚖𝚎𝚝 — lord huron   
★| 𝚟𝚘𝚒𝚍 — the neighborhood   
★| 𝚜𝚎𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚊𝚐𝚊𝚒𝚗 — wiz khalifa & charlie puth   
★| 𝚎𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚢𝚋𝚘𝚍𝚢 𝚔𝚗𝚘𝚠𝚜 — sigrid   
★| 𝚑𝚎𝚊𝚟𝚢𝚍𝚒𝚛𝚝𝚢𝚜𝚘𝚞𝚕 — twenty one pilots

  
  
  
  
╔═══ ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ═══╗

𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐋𝐀𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐑

╚═══ ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ═══╝

All publicly recognized characters, setting, dialogue, etc. are property of their respective owners. The original character, Kai Mathieson, and her plot line are my property. I am in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any previously copyrighted material.   
I also don't own any gifs, quotes, etc unless stated or said other wise. (for the most part i credit but in the chance i forget)

_No copy infringement is intended._  
  
  


∘₊✧──────✧₊∘

 **ᵗʰ** **ⁱˢ** **ᵖᵃᵍᵉ** **'** **ˢ** **ˢᵉᵗ** **ᵘᵖ** **ⁱˢ** **ⁱ** **ⁿ** **ˢᵖ** **ⁱʳᵉᵈ** **ᵇʸ** **ᵍ** **ⁱʳᵃˢᵒˡᵉˢˢˢ**  
  
  
  
  


∘₊✧──────✧₊∘


	2. ━━ 𝐚𝐜𝐭 𝐨𝐧𝐞

ACT ONE  
❝ 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯 ⋆ 𝘴𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘯𝘦 ❞

───── ⋆⋅ ★ ⋅⋆ ─────

"you can't survive alone"

───── ⋆⋅ ★ ⋅⋆ ─────


	3. 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄.

  
┌────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──────┐

𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘶𝘦

└────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──────┘

**_May 4th, 2018_ **   
  
  


**IT WAS SUPPOSE TO BE A NORMAL DAY.** I go to school and come home. Normal. That was until the rain came.

I was only eleven years old at the time. Perfect time for an international epidemic, right?

All I wanted back then was makeup to make me feel grown. Now all I want is food.

But now that I'm thinking of it, it didn't start as a typical day in the first place. I remember everything.

The day started with me feeling sick and begging my mom to stay home. After some convincing and guilt-tripping, she finally let me stay home while she and my older brother went to school. My mother was a teacher and one of the kindest hearts you'll ever encounter. She took care of me when I was younger and dealing with my ever-impending illness at the time. She helped me cope and never even made me feel like I was dying.

My dad was already at work as he left earlier than all of us. He's a scientist, a very respected one matter of fact. He's created so many cures to illnesses, including mine and other epidemics, that make the world a little less tragic—he is one of the best, next to Doctor Andersen.

I don't know the Andersens. I know that they have two children and that one of them is my age. That's about it.

I read _The Darkest Minds_ while listening to music, a book I picked up from the library. After a couple of hours, my fever had gone down, and my throat felt a lot better. I had a slight headache, but overall I felt a lot better.

That's when out of nowhere, I got an alert on my phone.

**_Severe Weather Alert_ **

_Strong Thunderstorm warning in effect forway across the Sweden area until further notice._

For a moment, I was confused. _Why would it be all across Sweden? Why not one area? And until further notice? This is normal, right?_

I shrugged, continuingto read, lying down on the bay window I was sitting on. It seemed normal. I mean, what does an eleven-year-old know?

_If only I knew._

I checked the time and looked out the window. Mrs. Robinson was our neighbor, and she looks after me when I stay home. She usually pops in once or twice to make sure I was okay.

I looked up at the sky, and it was sunny. But in the corner of my eye, I saw the faint resemblance of storm clouds.

That's when I heard a loud bang from the front of the house. I jumped from the sudden loud noise, my heart pounding. _Calm down; it's probably just Mrs. Robinson._

I took a deep breath and wiped my eyes as I started to head toward the front door.

I looked through the peek hole and saw Mrs. Robinson holding her bag, looking around distraught.

I unlatched the door and unlocked it after letting her in. She rushed in, heading straight to the kitchen and slamming everything she brought down. She breathed heavily as she gripped the counter harshly. She seemed in her world and didn't even acknowledge I was there.

All I could do was follow her in fear. _She's never done this before. What's going on?_

"Um, Mrs. Robinson-," I started, but she cut me off.

"Oh, Kai, baby, I'm so glad you're okay! I tried calling your mother, but she wouldn't answer! I came as quickly as I could, but I was glued to the tv and then I had to pack," she was talking so fast I couldn't even understand what she was saying, let alone what was going on.

"Mrs. Robinson, slow down and tell me what's going on. Where's my mom?" I said as I tried not to tear up.

"I believe she is still at school with your brother. As for your father, I don't have the slightest idea. But the reason I rushed over here is that there's something wrong with the rain, and it's-it's killing people. I had to watch my husband die at the store today, and I rush over here to make sure you were okay," she cried.

I couldn't believe it. She had to be lying. This seemed too much like a movie, and I was all alone. I shook my head furiously and pulled out my phone, dialing my mother.

After a few rings and nail-biting seconds, she picked up.

"Hello? Mom?"

"Kai? Kai, are you still at home? Is Mrs. Robinson there? Are you okay, honey? Please tell me that you haven't been outside."

"Yeah, I've been here all day, and Mrs. Robinson just got here. I'm okay, and I haven't been outside. I'm-I'm scared, mom. When are you coming home? What's going on with the rain?" I croaked.

She let out a sigh of relief before saying, "Thank god! My baby's okay. I don't have much time. I have to find your brother. I think he has soccer practice right now. Stay inside when it rains and stay calm. I love you and-"

The line dropped as a single tear fell down my face.

I looked at Mrs. Robinson, seeing her search for something in her bags. She cursed herself before grabbing her keys and heading towards the door.

"Where-where are you going?" I said, wiping my tears and wrapping my arms around myself, to possibly the last person I might ever see.

"I'm sorry, sweetie, but I forgot some important things at my house, and I have to go get them. I'll be back," she stopped and kneeled, grabbing my shoulders.

"If I'm not back in time and it rains. Lock the doors, close the windows, and don't let anyone, and I mean anyone in. You got that."

I nodded in fear as she got up, running out the door.

And the next thirty minutes felt like hours as I tried everything in my power not to think. I ended up failing and tried to call my father, but it went straight to voicemail.

But the weird thing was his voicemail changed. It used to be my favorite song from when I was seven that he let me set on his phone. But now it was a series of random numbers and letters.

I hung up and sighed, checking to see if Mrs. Robinson was back yet. I went to the same window from earlier. As if in slow motion, I saw raindrops fall from the sky. Moments later, I saw Mrs. Robinson run down our driveway before stopping in terror. She felt her cheeked and saw a raindrop. She dropped what she was holding, it crashing to the ground, and she fell to the ground and started spasming.

I covered my mouth in terror. Before I rushed to the door, I see what's was on the ground. It's was a picture of her husband. I closed all the windows and locked the door, sliding down it. I let all of my emotions break free as I sobbed, putting my head in my knees.

I was now completely alone. My mother, brother, and father could be alive, but I highly doubt it. If my mom went outside to find my brother-. I stopped mid-thought; I couldn't bear to fathom the outcome. My father could still be alive, but I have no idea how to find him. He never told any of us the location of where he works.

And by the looks of what I just saw, Mrs. Robinson and my mother were right.

There was definitely something wrong with the rain.


	4. yellow angel

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽   
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
**CHAPTER ONE** ━━ yellow angel

_Loneliness makes us all a little crazy_  
  
  


**IT'S BEEN SIX YEARS.** Six years since the rain fell. Six years alone.

After getting over the initial shock, all that I could do was gather my belongings and plan out how I would survive. Imagine how hard that is when you were only eleven years old. Incredibly hard, I'll tell you. Weirdly, the farthest amount that I had material was six years.

It's the anniversary of when the rain first fell. It's always hard around this time of year. Sometimes I feel like I'm going insane. Maybe I am.

I sighed, looking in the cabinet. There were only a few days worth of food, maybe even more if I stretched it.

I know I couldn't stay here. If I did, I would die from starvation. But wouldn't that be better than dying from the rain? Or being shot by one of the guards? I didn't know.

 _I can't live my life in fear._ I keep repeating this to myself until I slightly believe it.

I start to gather my things, stuffing it into one of my mother's backpacks. They were much larger than the ones I had in elementary school.

I swept through all the rooms in nostalgia. That was the only place I had ever known. But I had to see what's out there. Who's out there.

I was leaving today, no questions asked.

I rubbed the family portrait in my parents' bedroom. Well, my bedroom recently because I couldn't fit my old full-sized bed.

That's when something fell out one of the corners of the painting. It was a key with coordinates on it.

I rushed to the computer-like system; I found it a few years back. I used it to find out whatever I could about what was happening outside. I didn't find much, but I thought it could find out where the coordinates lead to.

Typing it into the database, I bite my lip in anxiousness _. How come I've never found this before?_

The screen beeped, signaling that it was done. It read that it was less than a mile away.

_That's in the house._

I followed the directions and found a hidden room.I couldn't even fathom that it was here _. All these years, I've searched through the house everywhere to find anything and everything to help me survive. This was here the entire time._

I used the key to unlock the door and entered to be brought to another access point. There was a keypad connected to another futuristic door.

I cursed myself before running out of the room, searching for anything that could lead me to the code. I searched for an hour, finding nothing.

I sighed, sliding down the wall onto the floor. I rested my head on top of my knees. I looked around the room, spotting my old phone.

As if a wave hit me, I got a flashback to six years back— _the voicemail._

I ran to the phone it still has a bit of charge after all these years. Then ran back to the room. I typed in the code as the voicemail played.

As I opened the door, it was like opening a freezer, not because of cold air but like decontamination air.

The room looks like a lab of the sort, just way messier. It had to be my father's.

I start to tear up as I think back to when I was younger. I don't remember much about my sickness. All I knew was that I was dying from what I never knew.

But standing in from of me was the same hospital-like bed from back then. The same blue turtle I clutched through the pain was still on the bed.

I grabbed the plushie and started my search throughout the room. Papers were dispersed everywhere. They all seemed like gibberish to me. Nothing seemed of importance.

I proceeded to look through boxes of things on the table in the center of the room. There were various papers about certain weird drugs and a _denied_ stamp on some of them. But that wasn't the strangest thing. I found documents labeled _Apollon_ about a project?

Suddenly before I could read anything significant, the room starts to turn red, and alarms start to go off.

I glanced around as a tv screen lit up in the corner. I saw a group of men in multiple places surrounding my house. From one viewpoint on the security cameras, I saw one man with a sleeveless shirt revealing... _a snake tattoo_?

_Who the hell are these strangers?_ **** _Why are they at my house? Well, whoever the hell they are, they don't look friendly. I have to get out of here._

I rushed out of the room. The whole house looks just like the room—Red, and alarms barring everywhere.

I slowly glanced around the hallways seeing if the bastards entered the house yet. Luckily they haven't yet, and I run to the bedroom, grabbing my already packed bag, and ran to the back door making sure it wasn't raining.

I looked back at my childhood home as I saw the armed men storm the inside.

"Goodbye," I said as I ran into the forest behind our house.

I look behind me, Seeing a few of the men diverting from my original path. I pressed on.

I was finally back in the real world. I could see the sky again. Smell the fresh air. See the trees. I was free.

I saw the sun had set, and not long after, it was dark.

I roamed the forest floor going nowhere in particular but still having my guard up for unexpected Strangers. I opened my backpack and pulled out my flashlight, tapping to see if it worked as I avoided puddles on the ground.

I smiled as I saw the faint light come on. _This will have to do._

But my smiles turned into a fearful frown as I hear rustling near me.

My breath shook as I thought of my possible death coming.

_Is it a Stranger? Or worst, an infected?_

Whatever it was, I had to defend myself.

I grabbed my flashlight tighter and wielded it. It was an ideal weight to knock someone out. That's the best thing I can come up with.

I turned the corner, shining my light on my potential attacker.

To my shock, it wasn't a Stranger or an infected. It was something weirder.

A person in a yellow hazmat suit.

My breath stopped. I thought everyone was dead minus the guards, and now with my knowledge of the Strangers. My idea of people being out there wasn't a strong belief, but here I am in front of them.

"Who-who are you," I finally spoke up, my voice cracking slightly.

I heard mummers but not much.

"Can you speak?"

She motioned yes but pointed to the head of the suit.

I got what she was saying and pulled out a notepad and pen. I gave them to her and waited as she wrote.

It read: Simone.

"That's your name," I asked.

She nodded again.

"Well, Simone, my name Kai. As you can see, I'm not infected." I wanted to make sure that she wasn't going to kill me. She looked, from what I could see, older.

We stared at each other for a while. I think we both couldn't believe that there someone other than ourselves out there. It was thought that all the survivors were taken.

She started to write again.

_How old are you? Is there anyone with you?_

_"_ Um, I'm seventeen and... no, I'm by myself. I'm trying to find my father. He works with Apollon. Dr. Andersen was one of his colleges. Do you know who and what I'm talking about?"

That when she started writing like lighting. I think it was because of something I said.

_Do you know my father?_

I scrunched up my nose as I said, " Your father... Your one of his children. Correct?"

She nodded quickly.

"I didn't know him, but he worked with my father, Dr. Mathieson. Can you help me find him?" I asked, hopefully.

She thought for a moment before grabbing my hand. She dragged me into the darkness using her flashlight.

If she were anyone else, I probably would have ran, but she was the closest thing I had to finding my father.

I don't have a choice. So that's what I did. I let the yellow angel guide me.


	5. sentiment

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽   
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
**CHAPTER TWO** **━━** **sentiment**

****

_"If we have each other then we'll both be fine._  
_I will be your brother and I'll hold your hand_  
_just know I'll be there for you."_

_— Alec Benjamin_  
  
  
  
  


**_"SHE'S DYING ALREADY JOHANNE. WHAT WILL IT HURT?"_ **

_"It's still in the development stage. Sten, you said you don't know what it's gonna do to her."_

_"Johanne, you've got to listen to me it's going to be revolutionary. It's going to put Apollon on the map, even more than before!"_

_"Let's not do this now your going to wake her up."_

I wake up in a cold sweat, pushing my bird nest of hair back. I try to slow my breathing before I rise from the bed, mindlessly walking to my dresser.

As I reach for it, it's not there. I wipe my eyes and look around in confusion.

_I'm at the bunker with that girl... Simone, I think that's her name._

I yawn and try to stretch my muscles. I walk to the kitchen and see Simone.

"Good morning," I smile before grabbing an apple and rush to the gym.

"Where are you going? I made breakfast," she asked.

"Gonna get an early morning workout squeezed in," I wink as she shakes her head.

Back at my old house, I would work out most of the time. I had to do something with all my free time cooped up in there.

Last night on the way back, Simone and I talked a little, and she showed me around. She was talking pretty low too. I wonder why, though.

As I worked out, I tried to think about everything. Even though Simone gave off the impression that she was sweet and caring, I had to keep my guard up. If post-apocalyptic movies taught me anything, it's that you never know who you can trust.

I can't believe she stayed here all by herself all these years. I know it must have been hard. I mean, at least I got to see the sky through the window every once in a while. She was down here all alone for six years.

But the main thought rushing through my head was about my father. The dream I had. Or was it a memory? I tried to rack my brain for answers, but I couldn't fathom anything. If I wanted answers, I had to find my father.

When I look at the time, it had been an hour. I decided that was enough for the day. I grabbed a towel wiping my face while walking to the kitchen. I guess I wasn't paying attention because I ran into something hard.

I reached out my hand and removed the towel. It was a chest. I pulled my hand back and looked up to find a boy—beautiful strawberry blonde hair, strikingly tall and... dazzling blue eyes. At least I thought he was tall, but of course, that's because I consider myself short.

I panicked and backed away, my face burning. I'm not sure if he could see me blush because of my complexion, but I still felt it— _the spark._

"S-sorry, I'm wasn't paying attention," I stuttered. _Ugh, you are so lame talk like a normal person._

He looked at me, but I couldn't read his expression. He looked to his sister in confusion?

"Umm, Who is this," he sarcastically laughed.

She looked up and smiled, but I knew it was fake.

"This is Kai. Mathieson. Her father was colleagues with Dad."

He looked at me with hope sparkling in his eyes. I looked down shyly and noticed his attire.

I quickly looked back up. _Just gonna act like I did not just see that._

He blushed, sitting down in an attempt to cover what he was wearing.

I smirked while rocking on my feet. _Nope, buddy, I already saw your Spider-Man underwear. But I mean, I like Spider-Man._

"Anyways Kai this is my brother Rasmus."

I had forgotten that she had a brother. After all these years, I've forgotten that they even existed. I would have thought that he died in the rain. _Luckily they have each other._

All of a sudden, she got very serious. I could feel the tension in the air.

"Rasmus...we can't stay here."

He spun around in the chair and stopped, "What?"

"We're leaving tomorrow."

"What do you mean?" He sounded a little scared. I decided to sit down on a stool facing him.

"Because... there's nothing out there," I could hear the sadness in her voice. I knew she hated telling her "baby brother" this. They seem closer than I thought.

"What are you talking about? You found Kai right?" he sounded panicked. I wanted to reach out and hold his hand, but I knew it was too soon. We barely knew each other. Being the comforting person I always was, I always preferred physical touch as comfort more than words. It was more real.

"I know but Kai already explained how I found her already. That's only one. Dad told me to look after you and to protect you, but I can't protect you against it because there's nothing."

"You went all the way outside?"

"It sucks. There's nothing out there for us. There's no one out there. Everyone's gone. It was only a coincidence that I even found Kai. She's your age and I can't protect both of you. I'm sorry, but all we can do is head for the next bunker. And then we'll be locked up down there, but that's all I can do. Moose, I can't do anything. I can't... I can't do it alone."

Rasmus listened attentively before scuffing and rising from his chair.

"Look you're not alone. I'm here, too. And now- now we have Kai," he grabbed his sister's hand.

I wanted to shed a tear from the beautiful moment happening in front of me. I haven't had love and affection like that since- since you know.

"Alright, you don't have to look after me anymore. We look after each other now," he said, glancing at me. _Am I included? How is he so cool with a stranger. The look he gave me showed an aura of who he is. Caring._

Simone sheds a tear. And then another, and my heart broke. The moment that they were sharing was so sweet and reminded me of my brother and me. He was older than me before everything happened.

I honestly loved him even though we weren't close. I regret not getting closer to him. While I had the chance.

I patted my face and saw that I had started crying. _Not the time, let them have their moment._

 _"_ Listen, I just wanna see the sky again, just for five minutes."

I smiled at his adorableness before straightening my face. _Is this what being around people feels like. Warm._ I felt a little coolness return to me as my thoughts grew darker.

They started to laugh a little.

"Tomorrow," he asked, joy emitting from his face.

They laughed softly as I started to leave the room. I feel like I'm intruding on them. I didn't think about that when I came.

I suddenly realized something. I don't belong here. They're sufficient on their own. I was alone, and it needed to stay that way. No matter how much I hated it.

I'm leaving. Tonight.


	6. dawn

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽   
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
**CHAPTER THREE** ━━ dawn

_The best things don't last_  
  
  
  
  
  


**I WENT BACK TO MY ROOM** and started to gather my things. I was so focused on packing that I didn't realize someone had walked in.

"Why are you packing," the voice said, and I immediately knew who it was.

"I'm leaving, and I wanna get gone and find shelters before the rain starts," I said, trying to sound emotionless but failed. _How did I get attached so quickly? Is it because they're the only ones I know? The art of human nature?_

"I thought you were heading with us. Why the change of mind?" I heard a little hurt in their voice. My heart winced. I hate hurting people, but I have to do this. It'll be better once I'm gone, and they forget about me.

I stopped packing for a second and faced him. _Why was this so hard?_

"When I first met your sister, I thought she was alone and that maybe I wouldn't get attached if she decided one day that she didn't need me anymore," I looked down, avoiding his gaze, and sat on the bed.

"But when I realize that she had a brother... my thoughts became more prevalent. I know that she doesn't need me. She has you, and that's okay. I don't want to be another burden on her. And if my brother was here-," I stopped and shed a tear.

I couldn't finish my sentence. All the bottled up emotions from the past six years finally came to the surface. All the years of being by myself came sprinting forward. I hadn't voiced my feelings in so long that I let them build up. A wall I didn't even know was there came crashing down.

I didn't know what Rasmus thought as he watches me crumble. _Pathetic, I would say._ But he didn't say anything. He came and sat next to me. And after a few seconds pulled me into a hug.

Everything felt right for once, like the world wasn't quite so dark.

After I calmed down from my long-awaited mental breakdown, we just talked. Something I haven't done for years. Talked. Laughed. Connected.

He told me how he and his sister got here and how he longed to see the sky. Smell the air and be free from being trapped down there. I could see the excited little boy come out of him as he spoke, and it made me smile. _How could someone so bright be surrounded by the darkness of the world?_ He reminded me of myself before everything went down. _Maybe I can be that girl again. Maybe._

Even though all I wanted to do was listen to him rant, all he wanted was to hear my thoughts. I've never had someone so interested in what I had to say. It was refreshing. I told him about my childhood. My passions. At least the ones I use to have. After years of confinement, I'm not sure I had any left. And I even told him about my father possibly being alive.

I seriously couldn't believe how similar we were. We both were sick when we were younger. We both were longing to find our fathers. Though he thought he was dead. I could tell he hated how his father left him. And he even blamed himself for his mother's death. I looked at it as him trying to protect him, but Rasmus didn't see it that way. I saw the anger he felt in the mirror Simone showed me. I felt for him.

I felt like I knew him for years. If only I got to know him years back before the rain. We could have been friends.

I felt sleep striking me as it got late. I laid on the bed, facing him as he laid down as well. We just stared at each other. My hazel eyes burrowing into his. The heat rises to my face as I looked away, playing with my fingers.

The dark thoughts that plagued me start to returns. I guess Rasmus saw that on my face resulting in him grabbing my hand. I smiled shyly before sleep enveloped me.  
  
  


_───_ ･｡ﾟ☆ _: *._ ☽ _.* :_ ☆ﾟ _. ───_  
  
  


As I woke, red lights and alarms were barring, just like in the room at home. I felt strong arms around my waist as I felt light-headed.

Using the strength, I had I removed his arms and stumbled out of bed. My head still felt fuzzy, and I started to panic from the confusion around me.

I saw a drifting Simone in the hallway trying to yell. All I got was _Get Rasmus._ That was all I needed.

I dragged the sleeping boy away from the bed and to the hall. If I didn't work out as much I do, I probably won't have been able to get this far.

I screamed for help, but all I got out was a quiet yelp. Simone came rushing, still drunk-like stumbling to help me save the barely conscious boy in my arms.

We dragged and ran as fast as we could to the gate. Simone was now about to collapse as I hammered my hands on the controls. _I'm not losing them._

Finally, the doors opened, letting us out. Air rushes to my lungs as I gasp.

Simone and Rasmus do the same as I sit on the ground, bridling Rasmus.

"Come on breath. Breath," I soothed.

We all embraced in a hug. We were all still in shock as we let go.

Rasmus looked to the sky and grasped the earth beneath him. I would smile but now was not the time.

And I was right because as soon as I looked up, I saw people with guns. And they were heading towards us.

That's when we started to back away in fear. My mind went numb, and I couldn't feel my legs for a second. I just stumbled on the ground as Simone pulled Rasmus and me up.

"Who are those people," he asked, not getting an answer.

"I don't know, but I don't wanna find out," I whispered in between breaths. I was behind Rasmus, and I was pulling on his shirt.

"Stay there! Stay!" I hear the man shout.

"We won't do anything!" Simone whimpers.

"Get inside! Go back!" the man persisted.

We backed away. I tripped, but that didn't stop the shoving. The cold gun barred into my face as tears arose out of me.

I felt a hand holster me up and pulled me into their chest as we did as the man instructed.

At that moment, things were going to change for the better. Or for worst.


	7. interlude shadow

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽   
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
**CHAPTER FOUR** ━━ interlude shadow

_"Please don't let me shine, Don't let me_  
_down, Don't let me fly"_

_— bts's suga_  
  
  


**THEY LOCKED US IN ONE OF THE ROOMS.** I was shaking as Rasmus and Simone converse in conversation.

I was zoned out in my own world. My knees in my chest as I wrapped my arms around them.

_Are these the same people that tried to invade my house? No, those guys had snake tattoos. Are they going to kill us?_

I could hear Simone bagging on the door, panicking. I was too, just more internal.

Rasmus sat down next to me. We didn't even look at each other. All he had to do my reach towards me, and I grabbed his hand. _Is this our thing now?_

It seemed to calm me down and zone me back into the world. Rasmus started to cry softly, rocking back and forth.

"I don't wanna be down here again," he repeated over and over again. Simone came to comfort him and him down. He needed his sister. But his hand never left mine. Like he was afraid that we might drift away.

"Rasmus, just breathe. We'll get out. We'll get out again; we just need to find a way to talk to them," she soothed.

"He said he was gonna kill her," he said, looking down.

Simone looked at me, and I knew what I had to do.

"Hey," I said, moving closer, patting his hair and making him face me.

"I'm not going anywhere. I'm right here," I cupped his face and smiled.

Simone tried to get their attention again as Rasmus put his head in my lap. I patted his head, telling him sweet nothings. The sweet nothings my mother told me when I was sick.

I shed a tear in remembrance before wiping it away quickly.

It was moments later when Simone ran toward us, yelling, "food, They need food."

Rasmus and I looked at each other before watching his sister yell. She kept yelling at them and writing on the mini window. Then out of nowhere, she smashed her tablet and pointed to her head.

I didn't understand what was going on, but I guess that was convincing enough to make them let us out.

Rasmus and I trampled behind Simone. We were told to pack our things and take them to the food.

We all headed outside again. We were held captive until they got what they wanted.

"Where's the bunker," the leader spoke.

"It's that way," Simone spoke, pointing in that direction.

"Okay"

"Move your ass," a smart-looking male said, shoving me aside. I could see Ramsus' jaw clench when he did that. I patted his shoulder, calming him.

"Get going," the smart male said again.

 _Why do you have to be so rude?_ I frowned as I glared at him. I felt anger gleaming off of me and darkness inside me.

That's when his glasses cracked. It wasn't significant, but it was subtle.

"What the fuck," he exclaimed, taking them off and looking at them. I gasped. _He was right. What the fuck?_

 _"_ You have better be telling the truth, or else," the leader said as we all started to follow Simone.

The group was behind us as Simone held Rasmus's hand, and he held mine.

He nudged his sister, "Look at the sun, Simone." His sister yeah'd him as I smirked.

"There's more where that came from. Wait till you see a sunset. It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen," I said, smiling at him, him returning it.

"You three shut the fuck up. Now!" one of the men behind us yelled.

My heart jumped, and I squeezed Rasmus's hand. We kept walking, not daring to look back.

"I'm scared of them, Simone," Rasmus said.

"I don't blame you," she replied.

"There's a road ahead. Which way are we going?" the leader said, receiving no reply.

We kept walking for about an hour and a half.

"What if he shoots us?" Rasmus worried.

"He won't," Simone replied.

"Maybe not now, but what about when we get to the bunker?"

That's when I spoke up, "He's not going to hurt us."

"I'm not buying it."

"What?"

"Their little story about being in a bunker for six years."

"Well, I was too scared to leave my house for six years," I mumbled. That earned me a shove by one of the males.

We stopped to take a break. They sat on a tree that fell over. That's when I noticed the full group.

The leading man, the smart _and rude_ looking guy, _the equally and might even be more rude_ guy, a girl, and the sick looking girl being nursed. Five strangers that could kill us at any given moment. _Great._

Rasmus and I just looked around as Simone, and the leader talked. I couldn't care enough to listen to them. I just kept pulling the tree in front of me, drowning it all out.

Not long after that, we kept moving me, and Rasmus was now close to the back. The girl they called "Beatrice" was a little behind us.

Rasmus kept looking towards the sky in wonder.

"What are you looking at," I asked.

"Trees," he replied, still in a trance.

"Trees are just trees," Beatrice joined.

"Not when you haven't seen them for six years."

"Have you always been with them, "Rasmus asked.

"It's best that you don't get to know me," Beatrice replies.

"Why?"

"So, you don't be upset when I die.."

"That's a weird thing to say.."

I don't know why, but I felt a slight burn in my chest. Like a threat. _Was I... jealous?_

Reached for Rasmus's hand, and he immediately grabbed it.

"Stop. Stop it."

Everyone stopped in their tracks as instructed.

"What's that," Rasmus asked.

"Get down," was all I got. Rasmus and I huddled together on the ground. Then a sliver colored sheet was thrown on our heads.

My breath shakes as I wait.

"What's going on, "I whispered, immediately being shushed.

"Who are they," Rasmus asked.

"They drive around collecting survivors. If they get you, you're finished," Beatrice answered.

"Finished? Like they kill you, or they take you away," I asked but didn't receive an answer. _Are these the Strangers?_

I watched the soldier-like men upon us as they converse amongst each other. They didn't look like the Strangers, so I'm guessing it's a different group. I couldn't figure out what they were saying, but one of three drone-like devices were in the air. It whirred around before heading to the sky.

I heard a scream behind me, making me jump. The men ran towards the sound. The scream continued.

It sounded like a woman screaming. _What was she saying? Help?_

My heart clenched as the thought of what they might do to her.

As the men became out of sight, we came from under the sheet.

"We have to go that way we can catch up with them," Simone cried.

"Come. We need to go," Martin disagreed.

"But we have to help that woman."

"No, damn it. Beatrice, let's go, come on."

"But she's crying for help. What kind of animals are you?"

"There's only two of them," Beatrice spoke up.

"What?" Martin said as he turned around, the whole group stopping with him.

"So, we can help her."

"No, we can't. We're leaving. Come," he ordered as he started walking away, a few of them following him.

Rasmus and I looked at each other and stood our ground. I then looked to Simone and Beatrice with a look of determination.

"Well, then I'll do it," Beatrice announced. She ran to Simone as Simone looked at us, signaling for us to come on. As we ran, I looked behind, seeing the others.

We finally catch up to the men and the distressed woman. Immediately the soldiers were shot by Martin. Beatrice ran to the woman, asking if she was okay.

The woman didn't answer; instead, she kept crawling. That's when I realized she had fallen in the water-filled raven. Mud lathered her legs as she struggled. _Oh, no._

I tried to brace myself for what was about to happen; maybe being next to the siblings would help. _It didn't._

Everyone stared at the woman as she finally managed to get up.

"I just want to go home to my family and my children. No," she cried.

In a flash, she was shot in the head. Blood covered the tree behind her as she collapsed.

Simone covered her mouth in shock. I back away in disbelief.

I tripped on the dead bodies of the soldiers. I gasped and crawled away. I felt darkness around me. It was just like that day six years ago. The day I watched a person die.

I struggled to breathe, and my heart raced.

_She was a mother. Is that what my mother felt when she was trying to get back home to me?_

I lost control of reality as my head felt dizzy, and I started to sweat. I brought my hand to my face, but I couldn't feel it. I lost feeling in my hands.

I felt myself lose control of everything.


	8. spanish sahara

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽   
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
**CHAPTER FIVE** **━━** **spanish sahara**

****

**_"_ ** _I'm the fury in your head, I'm the_ **** _ghost in_  
_the back of your head, Cause I am"_

_— foals_  
  
  


**THE WINDS STARTED TO PICK UP,** and trees swayed harshly.Storm clouds could be seen forming. It seemed that it could rain at any given second.

The group was still in shock from the recent death that unfolded in front of them. Simone still shook while Martin remained emotionless.

Rasmus shook his head, trying to register what was going on. But he couldn't, so he tried to reach for his newfound lifeline. But she wasn't there.

He looked around him, panicking until his eyes locked on a crawling girl in tears. That's when he knew.

Kai was having a panic attack. She had told him about them and how she had some when she was younger. It left the girl without a lot of friends. They were afraid of her. Especially since they didn't want to be friends with the "sick girl."

He ran to her immediately, but he felt a force keeping him in place.

"Stay back," she pleaded, new tears brimming in her eyes. He tried to look into her dreamy hazel eyes, but they weren't there. They were replaced by something completely different. A pit of a dark black abyss was all that was left. It seemed that Kai was no longer present.

"Kai, talk to me," he tried. The force holding him back fell. The girl heaved from exhaustion, from brokenness.

"It's my fault. All of it. I could have helped her. Both of them died because of me," A dark, sinking feeling engulfed the girl.

Rasmus slowly stepped forward.

"Who? That woman? You had nothing to do with that" _Both of them?_

The group starts to get uneasy as the sky darkens. Simone approaches her brother.

"What's going on? Is Kai okay?"

"No. She's having one of her panic attacks. I have to help her but-but I don't know how "

Simone pondered for a moment, trying to think of a solution quickly before responding, "Try doing what I do to calm you down."

"We need to go it looks like it's going to rain," Martin ordered.

The girl shivered, and sweat could be seen on her forehead. The wind continues to get stronger, and thunder starts to boom. Everyone started to try to head out. But Rasmus persisted.

He approached the girl bending down to her level.

"Kai"

She seemed too deep into whatever world she was in. She looked to be empty. Hallow. It was as if he was talking to the shadows. Until he heard whimpering. The whimpering turned into full-out sobs as everything around them swirled.

The team was leaving, but Simone stayed behind. But even she was losing patience.

"We'll do it all, Everything, On our own," he began to sing.

The wind was still whirling, but it was a bit less intense now. A few clouds could be seen disappearing.

"We don't need, Anything, Or anyone."

The wind had almost entirely come to a stop.

"If lay here, If I just lay here, Would lie with me and just forget the world," the girl sang, finally raising her head. Her cheeks were still soaked with tears; the brokenness could be seen on her face. He pulled her into his chest and embraced her.

She continued, "I don't quite know, How to say, How I feel."

"Those three words, Are said too much, They're not enough."

The girl felt herself get drowsy, and the darkness slowly leaves her. "If I lay here, if I just lay here, Would you lie with me and just forget the world."

The sweet moment slowly came to an end with the girl saying, "Thanks Ras."

And like clockwork, the girl was out. He didn't expect it, and he wasn't quite sure if she passed out or fell asleep. But he couldn't help smirking at his newfound name. _Ras._  
  
  


_───_ ･｡ﾟ☆ _: *._ ☽ _.* :_ ☆ﾟ _. ───_  
  
  


**_Kai's POV_ **

_Why does my head hurt so bad?_ I look down the see myself moving forward, but I wasn't touching the ground. I rose my head to find myself being carried. I hobbled on the person's back. I winced from the throbbing pain from my head.

"Hey, hey put me down," I groggily spoke.

The person slowly put me down as I wobbled on my legs. The person helped me steady myself as I looked them in the face. _Ras._

I wiped my eyes as I looked around me. I saw the group a few feet ahead, walking toward an abandoned building of sorts. I scrunched my nose in confusion. _How long was I out? How did I suddenly pass out?_

 _"_ How-how did we get here? And-and why were you carrying me?," I spoke as we continued to follow the group.

 _"_ You passed out I think and I carried you."

I sighed, "Did I - have another-"

"Yeah"

I closed my eyes briefly in shame. It's so embarrassing when it happens. I'm pretty sure everyone thinks I'm useless now. _Why do I have to be so weird? Why can't I be normal? They are right about me._

I walked faster, catching up to Simone with Rasmus following me. As we got closer to the door, though, Simone slowly covered both of our eyes.

"Don't look. Stay close to me."

_I wondered what she's talking about._

"Let's shut down for the night. Turn all the tables into beds," Martin ordered.

"We found these blankets in the gym," Jean responded.

"Good, help me move the tables together. I'll secure the windows. Patrick, is the water distilled?"

"Yes, it's almost done. Martin here's the duct tape," Patrick said as he continued working.

The whole time Rasmus, Simone, and I stood watching the group work. They didn't ask us to help or anything, but I want to. I want to feel needed.

Simone finally spoke up, "Can we do anything to help" I perked up.

"No, just keep out of the way. Especially, you," he glared at me. _I wish I could flip him off_.

"But you need a change of clothes. You can't wear that. You need proper footwear. Jean?"

"Yeah?"

"Try to find him some boots."

"I'm not his fucking butler."

"Then I'll find him some boots for fuck's sake," I spoke up, starting to get pissed. The blind disrespectfulness. There was only so much I can take.

Everyone looked at me. I had barely said anything to them since they kidnapped us. But what did you expect?

Martin ignored me and continues talking to Jean.

"Take him with you. The girl too before she says something else she might regret."

A glass shattered, suddenly making all of them jump. I, however, wasn't phased as I scoffed and stormed off.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


Moments later, we reached another room that had a fridge in it. Jean approached it happily, looking inside.

I stood off to the side, still a little pissed.

"Yes."

"You just going to drink it all," Rasmus said.

"Relax. There's not enough for everybody anyway. Ooh! Come here."

We followed him, and I stumbled backward by what I saw. Rasmus immediately looked at me, I think, to see if I'm okay. I breathed in and out and closed my eyes. I thought of the song Ras sang to me. I remember that part. The song. I nodded my head, signaling that I was okay.

"Check out the boots."

"It's... it's a dead person," Rasmus shakily responds.

Jean scoffs," They all are."

"Doesn't mean it's not still frightening," I spoke.

"It's your lucky day. The latest fashion."

Jean retrieved the boots before quickly leaving.

Rasmus sat down, pulling his backpack to his chest, looking to be in thought. I sat beside him, laying my head on the table.

We just sat there in silence for a minute before he suddenly looks at me, turning a little in the process.

"What's wrong," I looking at his concerned expression.

"When you had you... you know. You kept saying that it was your fault. You said that you could have helped her, but you didn't even know her. You even said "both of them," he said, ending with an even more confused expression.

As I processed what he said, I suddenly felt my mouth tasting bitter, and my throat closes up a little.

"There are some things I didn't tell you," I said, sighing and getting up, resting my head on my hand.

"Seeing that woman struggle like that and dying so gruesomely, it-it reminded of when the rain first started. That day I watched a person...die right in front of me. There was nothing I could do...and I could have prevented it. She went back out, and I could have stopped her. And not only that, but I wasn't that sick that day. I could have gone to school that day and somehow..." I stopped a few tears spilling from my eyes.

Before Ras could respond, I heard footsteps approaching. I wiped my tears quickly, straightening up in my seat. Ras clutched his backpack tighter. _Hope I didn't freak him out._

"What's the deal with the backpack," the person said.

_Why can't some of them just stop being assholes and leave us alone?_

"Because without us, you would probably be dead, and we need to find that bunker."

I sat up and saw Patrick. _Did I say that out loud?_

 _"_ Nothing, I've just got all my stuff in it," Rasmus nervously said.

"Are you hiding food from the bunker in it?"

Rasmus shook his head furiously. I knew he was scaring him, so I put my hand on his knee. His muscles relaxed slightly.

Then he took his backpack. He searched through it before responding," You're lugging drawings around?"

"Just give it back, alright," I said, clearly annoyed.

"Let's take a look at his art for a bit," I could feel my heart burning as I glared at him.

"You weren't in that bunker for six years. Do you think I'm stupid? If you'd been cooped up in that bunker for six years, you would have gone crazy. And you, sweetheart, I don't know how you survived. Looks like you had your ways, I guess."

That's what made Rasmus jump at him. I was mad too, but I tried to compose myself. He wasn't worth it.

He continued to search through his bag and pulled out a drawing.

"What's this? Space rockets? Dinosaurs. Do you like Dinosaurs? Who's this?"

"A man I saw one night. In the bunker."

"So, you weren't alone."

"We were alone, but I saw him that one night."

"So you were alone for six years except for that one night when a guy looked at you?"

He scoffed before looking at one more drawing. I rubbed my temples from frustration. _So this must be the downside of being around people. They can be annoying as hell._

From the corner of my eye, I saw him show another to Rasmus. From where I was sitting, I couldn't quite see it. But whatever it was, it made Rasmus snatch the paper from him. I could see a faint blush on his cheeks as Patrick laughed at him.

"Are you okay? Rasmus? Kai?" entered Simone.

"Maybe I have gone crazy."

"Leave them alone."  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


Thunder rumbled outside, and rain began to pour. Everyone had settled down for the night. My table was across from Simone and Rasmus. I seemed more isolated from everyone else.

I couldn't sleep. I was exhausted, but I couldn't sleep. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw the face of the woman. The one Martin killed. The look of pain staining her face. The fear.

I sat there for what felt like hours. I rose to see Martin and Beatrice gone. I wiped my face and felt sticky tears. And to top it off, my stomach hurt. I slowly rose from the table. I felt the heaviness. I knew exactly what it was. I rushed to my backpack, trying to make the least amount of noise as possible.

I ran to the bathroom, taking care of my business and discarding my messed up clothes. I splashed water on my face and looked into the mirror. I didn't recognize the person staring back at me.

I felt everything zone out. _Worthless_. _They'd be better off without you. They'll leave you anyway. Just like your family. Oh, wait, you killed them, didn't you? Do you really believe your father's alive? And worst of all, Ras doesn't- "_

The mirror cracked mysteriously as I burst into tears. Maybe what I'm thinking is right. I wish the pain would stop, but it just keeps coming back. I'm hopeless.

As I struggle to compose myself, I exit from the bathroom. I came back to the room where everyone slept and saw everyone back to their beds. I walked back to my bed but stopped.

I walked up to Ras and looked at his sleeping face.

I hated to wake him up, but I had to. He's the only thing that makes me feel sane.

"Hey, Ras," I whispered.

He stirred in his sleep but woke up.

"Hey, what's up," he groggily said. Even when he was in this state, he's a sweetheart.

"Um, I-I can't sleep...Can you sleep with me?"

It was worth a shot. He was probably gonna say-.

My thoughts were interrupted by him getting up and walking to my table. He patted the place next to him as I snuggled into his chest. Warmth embraced me, and I felt a slight ping in my heart.

I hope we find that bunker soon because I don't know how much I can take. I realized something that night. I had a crush on Rasmus Andersen.


	9. dauntless

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽   
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
**CHAPTER SIX** ━━ dauntless

_I'm not really good at this whole_  
_people thing_  
  
  
  
  
  


**HOW DO YOU LET SOMEONE KNOW** that you care about them? Distance yourself. Ever since I had that epiphany moment last night, I've decided to keep a distance between Ras and me. The long walk to the next bunker left me thinking about it a lot.

I realized that no matter what I thought I knew about Ras, I only have known him for a couple of days. I was getting attached too fast. Being isolated and by myself for six years must have left me with some serious attachment issues. I liked him too much to be too overbearing. But as much as it hurts, the best option was to stay away.

This, however, was extremely hard. I kept seeing him and Beatrice eying each other. This made my blood boil. So I looked to the skies trying to stay calm. It was a lovely day. The sun shined on my skin, warming me. It felt heavenly.

I sighed. Being with this group for who knows how long makes me feel more like an outcast than before. First, I thought I was barging in on Ras and Simone. I didn't belong with them. Now I'm in this group where they act like I'm useless. Maybe I am. _I want to know where I belong._

I shook my head, trying to erase those thoughts. The only thing I need to be focused on is finding my father. If he is alive, that is.

As soon as I finished that thought, I saw Lea fall.

"Ah, fuck!" she cried, tumbling to the ground.

"Martin!" Patrick yelled.

"What," he answered.

"Lea can't go on much longer."

I watched as Beatrice, Patrick, and Jean help Lea up. I bit my lip. _Why should I care about these people when all they've ever done is, be assholes? I don't know why I care, but I do. I guess it's just human nature_.

I turn away from them, looking to the front, seeing Simone and Martin talking. Accidentally, I look Ras in the eye. I could see something in them, but I couldn't tell what emotion. Whatever it was, it broke my heart to see. I tightened my grip on my backpack strap and walked past him without another glance.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


We were getting closer and only had to get past the river. I've tried to stay closer to the front to avoid Ras but drifted to the back since that didn't work. I guess walking from the end is worst because I see him and Beatrice talking. They walked close together. I felt that dark feeling come back to me. But before it took over, I saw Ras's foot go in a deep puddle.

_Aw, Shite._

I ran to them, ignoring my pledge. _I need to see if he's okay._

"Martin, Come check this out," Patrick informed.

"Beatrice, get away from him," Martin said, walking toward us with the gun. I gulped.

"No, you can't. Can't we see if..." she asked, stumbling on her words.

"No, we can't. Step away."

I started to breathe fast; just like I did the day he shot the woman. Everything felt like it was in slow motion as Simone ran toward us. I closed my eyes and felt the breeze before doing the impossible.

"No," I said, stepping in front of the gun.

"Step aside," he said.

"I said no," my voice getting deeper and my eyes getting darker. (don't ask why she knows that... she just does)

"Move, or I'll fucking shoot both of you," he said, shoving the gun into my chest.

I glared at him directly in the eye. I was losing patience. The once calm winds started to pick up, blowing my long curls in the wind. I sneered at him while the gun started to shake.

"Look, I know you've had a grudge against me since day one. Most of you have and frankly, at this moment I could care less. Most of you are a bunch of assholes anyway. But I'll be damned if I'm about to let anyone hurt one of the only people left that I care about," I said, close to tears.

Beatrice stood in shock while the scene was unfolding before springing into action.

"Simone," I said, wanting her to take care of the boot situation.

"Beatrice, you've got gloves, right?" Simone said nervously, shocked at the scene playing out. She feared for her brother and the girl she now felt responsible for.

"Yeah"

"Take off his boot."

"Is his foot wet?"

"Wait"

"I can't hear you."

"I don't know yet."

"It's too dangerous, Martin. Shoot him, before he infects us all," Patrick spoke up. I turned around, sending him a deathly glare. I'm pretty sure my eyes were full black now. He shut up just as quickly as he started talking.

Anticipation was building as Beatrice hurriedly took off his boot.

"No, it hasn't gone through"

Those words slightly calmed the spirit within me as I look back at Martin.

"For me, there's no one but him and her," I said, pointing to Ras and Simone.

"Don't ever do that again," I said firmly, my eyes returning to normal before tending to Ras.

"Hey, are you okay," I said, hugging him tight letting a tear fall. That was the scariest thing I've ever done.

"Yeah- yeah. Why did you do that? I thought you hated me now," he stuttered, still shaken up.

"Thank you, Kai. I really appreciate you sticking with us," Beatrice spoke.

"Of course, I'm sure you guys would have done the same for me. And Ras? I could never hate you," I smiled, grasping his hand.

Guess my plan failed. The best way to show you care about someone is: staying.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


The rest of the way to the bunker was silent, which wasn't surprising. I did insult most of them and call them assholes, which is rightfully so. Beatrice, even though I dislike her for.... reasons, is actually pretty friendly and caring. So is Lea though I've barely talked to her since she's been sick. Everyone else, though, stuck to the title.

_Maybe it's just because everyone's been on edge because of survival reasons. The end of the world does make you a little heartless. Or perhaps I'm just too sensitive?_

My head fills with these thoughts until a squeeze of the hand pulls me out of it. Ras looks down on me, signaling that we were here. I speed up, looking at both sides of the opening. I saw a pad looking for things on the side of it. I shrugged before putting my hand on the pad. I thought it would immediately it would turn red, signaling that my hand wasn't allowed. But surprisingly, it turned blue.

I looked at Simone in shock. _Does this mean that this was my dad's? What if he's here?_

 _"_ How do you have access," Martin said in disbelief.

I stared at the pad as it read my name.

"How were you authorized?"

"Does it matter," Simone said spitefully before I walked to the door following Simone.


	10. hopeless

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽   
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
 **CHAPTER SEVEN** ━━ hopeless

**_"_ ** _I've been thinkin' 'bout my father lately,_   
_The person that he made me, The person I've become,_   
_And I've been tryna fill all of this empty,_   
_But, fuck, I'm still so empty"_

_— lauv_   
  
  
  
  
  


**THE BUNKER LOOKS EXACTLY LIKE THE ONE BEFORE** except for one thing. Food.

I smirked at the full shelves as everyone rejoiced about the find. But just as my smirk came, it disappeared. Yes, the food was great, but I needed to focus.

I broke off from the group and started my search. Through the halls, it seemed to be nothing there of importance. I sighed, irritated at the odds facing me.

_Maybe my father isn't here. If not here, then where? Where are you, dad? I miss you._

A tear escaped my eye as I ran into the nearest room. I slide down the door, the emptiness inside me stinging my heart and soal.

_What if- my dad is dead._

"Please," I asked anyone who was listening.

"Give me a sign. Something"

I closed my eyes and raised my head to the sealing. _Hopeless._ I opened them, staring into the darkness. It felt comforting strangely.

I want to think I sat there for a while. Not feeling anything. Just numb. A feeling not unfamiliar.

I started to grow tired of the hard floor and started to get up, only for the door to hit me in the back of the head.

"Ow," I said, rubbing the spot. I turned to the light to see who it was to see Simone.

"Oh, Kai. What are you doing here?"

"So..um. I was looking for the bathroom. Yes," I scratched my head.

"Why were you sitting on the floor then," she crossed her arms, not buying any of my bullshit.

"Fine. I was looking for my dad or at least something of his," I sighed, pushing my hand through my hair.

"I thought that since I could open the bunker that maybe he would be here or have been here recently. It's just it's hard to believe that he might be gone. Or worst"

Simone held my shoulder.

"I know exactly what..."

She dragged on, staring in the distance.

"Exactly what," I looked in the direction she was looking in.

She walked closer to the other light source emitting, me following her.

I picked up what seemed to be a cellphone. I looked at Simone as she saw what I had seen. The background on the phone was her. And Ras. My heart ached as I saw Ras hooked up to a breathing machine and tubes. It hurt me that he had to go through what I had gone through.

As I looked closer, I knew. _This was their father's phone. Who else would have them as their background? I need to get Ras. He needs to see this._ As I pulled myself from my thoughts, I gave Simone the phone and gave her a look. She nodded at me as I left to find Ras her following me.

I jogged down the hall, passing and coming back to a door where I saw Ras in the corner of my eye. I gripped the edges of the door before coming into the room. But what I didn't realize was that it was the bathroom. And he had just gotten out of the shower.

I saw his sculpted body dripping with excess water while he dried his hair. All that covered him from being exposed was a single towel.

My breath jolted, and my cheeks burned as I reverted my eyes from the single towel coughing in the process. _Awkward._

Because I was probably frozen in place for a minute, Simone nudged me into the room. I brought myself back into reality as she closed the door behind her.

"Rasmus. Look at this," she said as I sat down on a bench nearby.

"It's dad's."

"What," Ras said in disbelief, grabbing the phone.

Simone chuckled in relief, "He was here. Right here."

"I found something really strange on it. Look," she said as they sat down next to me.

"It's an old video message from Dad's colleges. He must have sent it to Dad while we were in the bunker. Here it is."

I scooted closer to Rasmus to get a closer look. As Simone started playing the video, my heart stopped.

"Fredrick, I'm sorry about our children. But we can't stop now. We must go on. We've made it to the head office in Sweden."

The signal started to get messed up. I felt my face to find fallen tears.

"I don't know where you are, but you must come no matter the cost. We have to solve this. Only we can do it. Unless we find a cure, it's the end of the world."

I looked to the brother and sister duo sitting beside me.

"That's my dad," I said just above a whisper.

"The head office in Sweden. Rasmus, That's where Dad is. Where-where Kai's father is too."

I got up, putting my hands in my hair. _My father is alive. Not even an hour ago, I thought he was dead. But he's alive._

"Why did he say he was sorry about Kai and us."

"I don't know. But Dad's alive, Rasmus. And he and Kai's father are making a cure to save the world."

"As he did for me," I spoke up, voicing my fumbled thoughts.

"We need to go there," Simone finished.

I sighed and smiled, looking at them in determination.

"Let's go find our dads."


	11. youth

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽   
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
 **CHAPTER EIGHT** ━━ youth

" _R.I.P. to my youth, If you really listen,_  
 _then this is to you, Mama, there is only so much_  
 _I can do Tough for you to witness it_  
 _but it was for me too"_

_— the neighborhood_   
  
  
  
  


**_"WE'VE MADE OUR WAY INTO THE HEADQUARTERS IN SWEDEN._ ** _Get here now, no matter what it cost you. We must fix this..."_

"He was told to go there," Simone spoke after moments of silence.

I jumped slightly, making myself more aware before rubbing my eyes and sipping my coffee.

I didn't sleep well last night. I mean, I was too relieved, but my anxiety about the whole situation was too high. If my father is alive, as I believe, he might be in trouble.

I decided to drink some coffee so I could stay alert today. Simone thought it would be a good idea to tell Martin. I was against it since he was a colossal arse, but I'm not the adult here, as you can see. Ras was up, but he kept looking at me. I think it's because of my vast eye bags.

"Did you find it here?" Martin spoke, conversing at the table in front of us.

Simone nodded as he continued.

"What did your dad do?"

"He-he works for Apollon alongside Kai's dad," Simone said as Martin glanced at me. I lifted my finger in agreement as I accidentally spilled my drink. Ras handed me a napkin as I gave him a small smile as a thank you.

"Doing what?"

"Trying to save the world," Ras spoke up.

Martin chuckled, "Trying to save the world from here? Great that went well."

"They were working on a cure."

"But they didn't find one."

"You don't know that."

"Yes, I do. We've heard those rumors a million times. And that message is six years old."

"But you haven't been there, have you? Have you been to Sweden, to Apollon?"

"No, but we've been to other places that were allegedly better."

Simone sighs, "Come with us or stay. We're going."

"You don't realize how serious this is. That was my father. He's the only blood relative I have left," I said, gripping the used napkin in my hand harder.

"I want to know if our dads' alive," Simone continued.

Martin persisted anyway, "If your dads' we're alive, he wouldn't have left you in a bunker for six years."

"Mind your own shit," Ras fired back as I giggled.

"And you in that house alone."

"I probably would have still been there dead if I didn't get out," I said.

"Wait. What?" Ras asked.

"These strangers raided my house. I got out before they found me, but I still don't know what they were there for. I guess just gathering survivors," I said as everyone listened.

Martin sighed, "Okay. The only way to Sweden is through Copenhagen, and the only way out of Copenhagen is the Long Bridge. The other bridges were destroyed."

"Why's that," Ras asked.

"To make control posts to restrain people and contain the virus."

"I've heard about those," I whispered, mostly talking to myself and no one in particular.

"Walk along the trail until you reach Central Station. Steer clear of the Strangers and other people. The few in the city will kill you for food. We'll stay here and survive," he ended before walking out.

Simone pondered for a moment before looking at Ras and me.

"Pack your stuff."

We nodded before heading to grab our bags.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


I sighed as the doors to the bunker open, gripping the strap of my backpack. Once they were up, we walked out.

"Simone, do you think we can make it without them?" Ras asked. I could tell he was anxious.

"Hey, of course, we can. Come on. Let's go."

As I followed them, I caught up and walked beside the strawberry blonde boy.

"Yeah, we can make it. Most of them are assholes anyway," I smirked, looking at him as he gave me a small smile that didn't last.

"But the city is dangerous. What if we meet people there?" he persisted.

"We just have to get through unnoticed. We'll reach the next bunker before dark. We'll be safe there."

"I don't like it."

"I know, but we're gonna make it. We all are gonna make it," she said, glancing at me. _Could she sense the slight fear that developed within me? Damn, she's good._

I decided to focus on the road ahead because we still had a long way to go.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


"Oh, baby, look what you've done to me," I sing and smile at the scenery of the forest.

"Oh, baby look what you've done now," I closed my eyes breathing in the fresh air.

"Oh, baby, I'll never leave if you keep holding me this way, oh o-oh," I finished and opened my eyes.

I heard clapping from ahead of me. I had forgotten it wasn't just me anymore.

"You've got a great voice Kai," Simone said, looking back, giving me a small smile.

I lower my head in embarrassment. I've always been told in grade school that my voice sucks.

"Yeah, it's perfect. What song is that anyway?" Ras slowed up, asking me.

"Um, it's by this band from a long time ago. It's called Stockholm Syndrome."

"So, you've always been into singing and stuff."

"Yeah, it's one of the only things that's calming to me. It's like a breath of relief, you know."

"Yeah, Simone and I used to have dance parties back in the bunker a few years back."

He moved a little closer, whispering, "She's a terrible singer."

"Hey, I can hear you know," she yelled, and we all chuckled.

"Kai, you got any granola bars left," Simone asked.

"Yeah, give me one second," I said, taking off my backpack and opening it.

My backpack being quite full, some things fell. I bent down along with Ras and picked up the dropped items.

I grabbed what I could and got up from the ground. I gave Simone the bar while Ras handed me what fell. I looked up when he stood there for a moment, not saying anything or moving. When I looked up, I saw.

He smiled mockingly, "Why are you carrying around a blue turtle."

"Hey, give it back," I said, reaching before he moved it above me out of my reach.

I pouted, looking him in the eye. Simone stopped looking at us shaking her head.

"Last time I checked, you still carry around space drawings, Captain Kirk," I smirked.

"First off, I have no idea who you're talking about. Two, space ships are cool," he said, lowering his hand.

"Sure they are," I said, grabbing the stuffed animal.

We started walking again.

"I keep it because it reminds me of my mom," I said suddenly and sighed.

The siblings were now on both sides of me, listening intently.

"When I was sick, I use to have to go through various tests and try a lot of different kinds of medications. I was a sensitive kid, so most of the things made me have reactions. So to help power through the pain, my mom bought me a blue turtle. My favorite color used to be blue, and I always loved animals, especially underwater animals. So yeah, I've kept it ever since."

There was a short silence before Ras spoke up.

"I'm sorry about your mom. I did- didn't know. I'm sorry I made fun of you-"

"It's alright," I said, looking at him.

"You both have had you our own struggles, and I've had mine. You guys lost your mom too. She was a hero. What am I to host my pity party. I'm not that important," I said, not really paying attention to my words but just saying whatever came it my brain. My secret thoughts.

"Hey"

Simone put her hand on my shoulder.

"Kai, it's never easy to lose a parent no matter what the cause of it is. You matter, and if you want to talk more about what happened, you can talk to us. Your our family now," She smiled.

I yeah'd her giving both of them a fake smile. _I don't think your ready for the darkness within me. I haven't told you everything, and I don't know if I can._

I clutched the only remaining piece of my dark childhood in my arms.

"Looks like we're here," I sighed.


	12. play date

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽   
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
 **CHAPTER NINE** **━━** **play date**

****

_"Don't want to leave this play date with you"_

_— melanie martinez_   
  
  
  


**"HOLY SHIT," I WHISPERED AS** we entered the abandoned city. Hundreds of abandoned cars were everywhere, accompanied by worn-out buildings. There were nasty old restaurants sprinkled without that looked like they haven't been used in years. It reminds me of a discarded New York of sorts. Everything so big and people feeling so small. It must have been so busy here before everything went downhill.

"Shit, this is crazy," Ras said as we continued walking down the massive road in the middle of the city. _This gives me anxiety_.

"It's destroyed," I said, glancing at the sidewalks full of various lost items like newspaper stands, tires, and more.

"What the hell happened here?"

As we walked further, I see two large storage containers and blocked the way to the rest of the road.

"Look. What's that?" Ras asked, looking at it before taking off.

"Rasmus, don't go in there!" Simone yells after him before looking at me.

I looked around, cluelessly pointing at myself. She nodded and pointed in Rasmus's direction desperately.

"Fine, fine, I was just teasing," I smirked before sprinting after the strawberry blonde boy, my confidence decreasing the closer I got to the storage unit.

When I got there, Ras was trying to enter and steps slowly into the unit. I didn't know how slow he was going in, so as soon as I stopped, I trip into him, almost falling.

He immediately stopped walking and helped me up.

"Are you alright?" he asked, slight worry covering his face.

I nodded as he hosted me up me stumbled against his hard chest.

I looked up, seeing him look down at me, his blonde curls falling gracefully down his face. His face looked so sharp and structured. It was as if it was sculpted to perfection, along with the gift of a sprinkle of freckles. But none of that mattered to me as much as his eyes that stared into my hazel ones. His beautiful blue eyes like the sky. The sky he used to tell me he wanted to see.

My breath seemed to stop the second it happened, but his kept going slow and regular like a river. My heartfelt like it stopped, but my hand was on his chest, and I could feel his heart beating fast. We stayed like this for what seemed like forever, but it was probably only a few seconds. But those seconds felt like an eternity.

Sporadically, our moment ended when Simone caught up to us. Ras backed up, coughing to cover up his very apparent blush. I felt my face burning as I scratched my neck.

My hands were slightly sweaty, which was weird because never in my 17 years on this earth have I had clammy hands. My heart was now racing a million miles a minute as I tried to stop my racing mind.

_Wait. What the hell was that? Why do I feel this way?-_

My thoughts were interrupted by the noise that followed Rasmus hoisting up his sister. I took a deep breath, trying to decrease the anxiety pending up inside me as Ras looked further in the unit. Simone looked very worried as she called out to her brother.

"Rasmus. Rasmus, we have to keep moving. Come on, Kai," she said, begging.

"Ok. Ok," I said but didn't mean it.

I was sort of in a trance as I explored the unit. But the further I looked, the more I saw that it looked to be an upside-down bus of sorts. Well, I think. I turned my head, looking closer.

"Rasmus! Kai! Get down someone's coming," Simone whisper shouts pushing both of us down.

Ras pulled me into his bent lap and his sister under his arm. I closed my eyes in fear grabbing his hand.

"Keep quiet," Simone whispers. I take a shaky breath.

As the unknown got closer, I bit my lip.

"Having fun?"

"Hey"

I opened my eyes to find Lea, Beatrice, and Jean in the opening of the unit. I scoffed, smirking, and let out a sigh of relief. Ras laughed, leading to us all laughing. We stood up, greeting the group.

"What's going on," Simone asking, smiling herself.

"We're going with you. We believe in you. You're kind of a... What did you call her?" Beatrice asked.

"Guiding star," Lea says.

"Yes"

"You guys believe in us?" I asked nervously. I've never been good at speaking to people. Well, ones I'm not comfortable around. They seem friendlier from when we first met them, though. Maybe a good meal does something to you.

They all nodded.

"Lea believes in God," Jean speaks up.

"It has nothing to do with that," she defends.

"Sure, it does."

"No, it doesn't."

They go back in forth in playful banter. They seemed to be like their own little family. I smiled at that before looking at Ras and Simone. Family.

"A guiding star is just someone you want to follow," she finishes.

"Someone you believe in," I added, looking Lea in the eyes smiling. She smiles back, agreeing.

"What about the others," Simone asks.

"Yeah. They will follow, sooner or later, when Martin realizes we aren't coming back," Beatrice smirks.

We all laugh again.

"Why are you looking at me," Simone says.

"Because you're in charge," Jean says as we nod and look at her again.

"But... No, I... I'm not in charge of anyone." she says nervously.

"Then I'll be in charge," he jokes, leading me to laugh and everyone following.

"Perfect!" she plays along.

"Want me to drive?" he continues adding fuel to the fire and leading me to laugh so hard I grab onto Ras for support.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


"I had a dream about you last night," I sang, pointing at Ras. He smiled, his eyes sparkling as he bobbed his head.

"Your eyes were shining so bright," I closed my eyes swaying along to the song.

"Those lips and that bittersweet smile, I need this forever," I smiled, singing now to Lea. She held her heart dramatically.

"Beautiful dream, yeah, yeah," Jean sang very badly, might I add. I laughed but continued.

"Don't know what it means, yeah, yeah," I sang, jumping down from the platform I was on.

"All I know is I don't know," Ras sang. We all "oo" ed because he had a lovely voice. I grinned at the sight.

"But I need this forever," I finished and turned off my phone. Even though I couldn't text, call, or anything like that, I could still play my precious music.

Everyone gave me a round of applause as I bowed.

"I'd like to thank my producer and manager for this award. But most of all I'd like to thank the person who gave me singing lessons," I said dramatically, hugging the back of Jean.

"I taught her everything I know," he said as we all laughed.

For the last hour or so, we all just hung out. Jean tried driving the bus jokingly. I ran down the isles, singing most of the time. The rest of the group laid across the unit like it was turned upright, even though it wasn't. Overall, we all got a lot closer, and I could call them my friends now. I never sing around people, mostly because I'm shy about my voice, but I can sing around them now. I feel free for the first time in a long while.

After that, we decide to leave the storage unit and move forward. I walked beside Ras as we passed a vacant Burger King. I tapped his shoulder before almost he walked past it.

"Look"

"Anyone hungry," Ras announced.

"I'm always hungry," Jean replied, looking at us. We smiled at each other before Ras and Jean walked into the building.

"Come on, guys. We need to keep moving," Beatrice obliged.

"One burger won't hurt," I said, picking up an old Burger King hat putting it on. I put my hands on my hips and walked into the old restaurant dramatically.


	13. numb

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽   
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
 **CHAPTER TEN** **━━** **numb**

****

_"I need you to show me love,_   
_Cause I'm getting numb to the feeling"_

_— chase atlantic_   
  
  
  
  
  


**"CAN I TASTE ONE OF YOUR CHILI FRIES,"** Ras asked Jean.

"I'm eating the same as you, food from the bunker," Jean replied.

"But what if you weren't. This is Burger King," I answered him, smirking and putting down the notebook I was drawing on.

Before I met the siblings, I used to draw in the house a lot. I would just get a feeling to draw. But the weird thing was most of them were in dark ink even though I had other colors at the time. They always carried a dark aura.

I drunk my water before putting my leg under my opposite knee, turning toward Ras (sitting next to me) and Jean (sitting in front of Ras).

"Okay, I'm eating," I closed my eyes, pausing. "a Twix pie," I smiled.

"Of course you would eat a dessert. If you could, you would eat a pound of sugar a day," Ras said sarcastically.

I stuck out my tongue at him while saying, "You know I love sweets."

Jean looked at me funny before compiling.

"Okay, I'm eating... a pizza with shawarma, greens, and dressing," he said as I cringed in disgust _. I hate shawarma._

Everyone chuckled.

"Well, it has to be from Burger King," Ras argued, slightly smiling.

"I'd rather have a pizza," he responding while I rolled my eyes playfully.

They went back to talking while I finished up my drawing.

"Hey, whatcha drawing," Lea said, leaning over the table a little to get a closer look.

I zoned back in before saying, "Um, I don't know."

The drawing was set outside of a facility. I tried to decipher what building it was, but I couldn't. Everything in the picture was pretty vague, but the centerpiece. It was of two individuals. One seemed to be of a female while the other one was male. There weren't any distinguishing facial features to decipher these two individuals' identities, but what surrounded them was mind-blowing. They were surrounded by...darkness. Like a dark cloud or aura was around them. But there was something about the girl that stood out; she had her hand held out toward the paper. It was as if she was controlling something I couldn't see.

The feeling I got from the image I created left me unsettled. I didn't know why, but I couldn't stare at any longer. I flipped the paper and shivered as if the air ran colder.

Ras looked at me while I shivered with a concerned expression before getting up from his seat. He took off his jacket, throwing it on my face. I sighed, glaring at him before slipping the more oversized coat on. He smirked before continuing his conversation. I gave him a small smile as a thank you before looking across the table. Everyone was still eating except for one person. Lea. She looked me in the eye, making sure I was paying attention before she mouthed something. I frowned, pointing at my ear. She mouth again. _You guys look cute._

I looked down, my face burning once again, but my heart fluttered this time. I knew that I liked Rasmus, but the thoughts in the back of my head still remained. _He probably thinks of me as a sister. He probably likes older girls like_... I looked down the table. _Beatrice_. Everyone was still talking, including Ras. He was talking to Beatrice and laughing. My heart clenched. _What was I ever thinking? That someone as kind and perfect as Rasmus to like me? Me of all people. Never in a million years_. I lifted the jacket to my nose, breathing in his scent. My heart broke as if someone had clipped a piece off.

"Kai," someone shook me furiously. I jolted up as a few of the packages of finished food flew off the table. Everyone looked confused, including me. No one had touched them in over 10 minutes now. I looked down at my hand before zoning back into what Simone was now saying.

"We need to move on. It's dangerous here in the city. There's a bunker in Amager. We can spend the night there."

"Okay," Jean said, getting up, gathering his belongings.

"Where are you going," I asked.

"To get some new glasses. Is that okay?"

Everyone was now inventively listening.

"I haven't been able to see clearly for years with these."

"Didn't you hear Simone? It's dangerous here. If it starts raining, we'll be trapped," Beatrice said.

"You have five minutes."

"That's fine."

"I'll go with him and make sure he gets back here," Lea said, getting up and joining him.

Simone and Beatrice sighed hesitantly, agreeing as they left.

"Do you think Martin's looking for us?" Simone said.

"Whatever. I don't need him anymore," Beatrice said but hurt escaped her tone. I knew there was a story behind it, but I was afraid to ask. So I stayed silent.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


It's been about an hour. They still aren't back, so we moved around the Burger King anxiously. I sat on the floor Ras about 2 feet away as Beatrice sat at a table in front of us.

I kept looking at her trying to see what made her so appealing. But not long after, I caught myself and stopped. _I was jealous._

"What's so dangerous about the city anyway," Ras asked.

"There was a lot of food here at first. So people gathered here and infected each other. Those that weren't infected were so desperate they stole from each other. Now they're killing each other for food," Beatrice said, relaying the story.

"People kind of suck."

"Yeah, like those people," I said briefly, scoffing and pointing at the windows in front of the Burger King. I got up from the floor, backing away.

"Fuck, they're hungry," Beatrice said, looking in that direction.

"Simone. Simone," I said, getting louder each time.

"We have to get out of here. Come on!"

Simone looked up, confused, stumbling over her words.

"Now!" Beatrice yelled.

"Guys!" I cried, not wanting to know what would when happened those doors open or broke.

"What's happening," Ras said fearfully, getting up.

"What about the others?" Simone hesitated. I started to breathe hard as I stared at the front of the restaurant, watching more and more people approach.

"Come on. Now!" Beatrice yelled again.

"What-," Ras said before I grabbed his arm and started running behind Beatrice and Simone.

"They're coming!" I yelled.

That moment the large group of hungry pedestrians busts through the door, flooding in.

We ran through the back door, Beatrice leading the way.

"Fuck. This way," she said, panicking.

"Beatrice," Ras pleaded.

"We have to find Jean and Lea."

"Simone."

We now ran through the kitchen, Ras and me passing Simone. Banging and shouting grew closer to us.

"Simone! Come on!" I yelled, now close to tears from the fear-inducing experience happening. I kept taking deep breaths letting the adrenaline take over before I continued running.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


We kept running until we stopped randomly in front of a bunch of old apartment complexes. I never stopped to look behind me. I soon realized that Simone wasn't here.

"Where's Simone," I said frantically.

"I swear she was here a minute ago," Ras said, panicking.

"It's going to rain soon," Beatrice said in a daze.

"We have to find Simone first."

"No, we have to get inside."

I swallowed hard, looking around us for shelter for however long it was going to rain. I saw Beatrice looking at a particular apartment building.

"I grew up right there," she said in remembrance.

"What?" Ras said, confused. Why was she acting like this?

"I was born there; my mother gave birth to me in there."

"Okay."

Thunder rumbled.

"Come," she said, leading us into the building.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


Once we were in the building, she lead us down the halls like she knew exactly where to go. She stopped on a door that read #37 before opening the door; it surprisingly was unlocked. We walked down the hallway of the small apartment. It looked like an average childhood home. How nostalgic this must feel for Beatrice.

"I hope Simone made it inside," Ras spoke, breaking the silence.

"Me too," I said.

"I'm sure she did," Beatrice answered after a few moments.

In the room, banging could be heard. When I stepped in, I found that it was an almost closed window. I then heard cooing above, startling me into Ras. He laughed as I flipped him off. There was a bird on the chandelier. Dead flowers were on the dining table.

Ras gasped, "You lived here," he asked. Another pigeon fluttered its wings, startling Ras.

I snickered as he glared at me.

But, Beatrice still didn't answer. She just kept examining the room.

"Why haven't you been back all these years," I asked.

"It's a long story."

"I'm willing to listen," I gave her a small smile. Even though I envied her, I still cared for her somehow.

"I have a secret that I haven't told anyone. My parents were getting divorced. My dad had just told me. I didn't want to talk to them. I just took off to see a film. And when I came back out, everything was gone. He'd been calling and leaving messages. In the first one, he said my mom was sick but that she'd be fine. And in the next one, he had started to feel sick too. He didn't know what to do. He felt... strange. He told me to take good care of myself and never come back home. And in the final message, there was nothing. Only silence," she said as she closed all the windows and walked to a corner in the room.

My heart broke at her pain, and I understood her a lot deeper. We both had been through similar things, and I misjudged her far too soon.

I walked toward her, a tear gliding down my cheek. When I got to her, I wrapped my arms around her as she cried silently. Ras came closer, peering into the bedroom of sorts.

"It looks like they liked each other in the end," he said.

"They did," she said emotionless. I knew how that felt. _Numbness_.


	14. misery

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽  
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
 **CHAPTER ELEVEN** ━━ misery

_"_ _I am in misery_ _"_

━ _maroon 5_  
  
  
  


 **I'VE ALWAYS BEEN A FAN OF BAY WINDOWS.** When the sun is shining, when it's snowing, and even when it rains. When the heat from the sun hit my skin, I feel in bliss with its warmth. When it snows, it's pure beauty and even magical. When it rains, it's calming and the perfect time for a nap or to just slow down and think for a moment.

But after the rain first fell, I became cautious because the bay window at my old house was out in the open. This meant that whoever who was on the street could see me, so I rarely sat there anymore. Didn't want the guards knocking on my door.

I smile at the memory as I turned down my music.

At the moment, Ras, Beatrice, and I were still at her old house. And coincidentally, we are sitting on her bay window seat waiting out the rain.

It was still pretty silent, but I didn't really mind. The story she told us was.. chilling.

Suddenly after a while, Ras put his arm around me. My heart fluttered, but I tried to keep it cool.

"Has the rain stopped," Beatrice asked, suddenly frightening both Ras and I. Ras retreated his arm away from my shoulder as he stuttered on his words. _I get that he was frightened, but why is he acting this way. Weird._ I just looked around like nothing happened.

"Uh... No... Yes," he said, quickly glancing at me and the window behind us. I smirked. _Adorable_.

"Do you kids wanna go to the roof," Beatrice smiled.

"A roof," I perked up excited.

"Yeah, it's down the hall. You'll see it when you get there."

I got up quickly, putting my music away. I smiled at them as I beckoned them to "come on." Ras smiled back as he came to me. I looked at Beatrice.

"You coming Bea," I said.

"No, I think I just need a little alone time. I'll come get you when it's time to go," she sighed.

I gave her a weak smile before I walked out of the room with Ras on my tail.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


I let out a gasp as I lifted myself to the roof. I ran to the edge of the building, making sure to be careful not to run off. Ras wasn't that far behind.

As he came to stand beside me, I felt in a trance. It probably wasn't the most beautiful sight to most people, but to me, it was unreal. I'm one of those people who are slightly afraid of heights but still go to high places to see how beautiful the world is up high.

There were still some dark rain clouds above us, but it wasn't raining anymore. The buildings below us, for the most part, looked identical but with its own touch. They looked that they have been there for a long time but didn't look aged.

"The view is awesome up here. You can see everything up here," I said.

"It's crazy plus there are no people in sight," Ras spoke, enjoying the gaze with me.

"Yeah, it would better if you weren't here," I said, looking serious.

Ras looked at me sternly, almost as if he was hurt.

I cracked up.

"Look at your face, Ras. Relax I was just joking. My burns are out of love not hate," I laughed as I nudged him.

"I don't get it," he said, still not smiling.

"It's irony. Say the opposite of what you mean," I said, straightening my face.

"Why?" _Wow, this boy is more clueless than I thought._

"Because."

"Because your ugly," he said.

I put a hand over my heart dramatically, taking a step back. He smiled. Once I came down from being dramatic, I looked at him, finally understanding what he said. I took a step closer as we just looked into each other's eyes. _He did not just say what I thought he did._

Suddenly, I hear shuffling behind me, and I look to see its Beatrice.

"Come on. Let's find your sister," she said before going back down.

I look at Ras him, still staring at me as I follow Beatrice.

_Clueless and smooth at the same time. Dangerous._   
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


"There she goes," I whisper shout as Simone enters the Burger King we were in earlier. I didn't want to come back, but Beatrice insisted. I was scared that those savages were still here.

As she approached where we were, Ras stood ready to scare his sister. I motioned "no" to him, discouraging it. Before I thought it would be funny but Simone looks.. frightened.

He scared her, making her scold him. I shook my head. _Told him._

"What the hell do you think you're doing? Moron!," she said, hitting him. Ras's smile faltered.

"It's not funny. We can't stay here," she continued walking toward the entrance.

"Simone, what's going on? What happened?," I said, getting slightly scared.

"Now! Hurry up!" Ras and I hurriedly started to follow her.

"Simone, what's happened," Lea says, but Simone starts to through our things at us quickly. _What the hell is going on?_

"Grab your bag. Put it on. Put the bag on," she says, frantically all of us starting to panic.

"I fucking hate you," she says to Ras.

I frown, hurt even though she didn't even say those words to me.

Before I could process anything further, a homeless-looking man walks into the store. He held a knife as I stepped back.

"Give me your food," he said.

"We can't spare any," Jean begged.

"Now!," he says, getting closer as my heart races.

"Give him the bag," she says.

"But Martin says- " Jean protested. I shed a tear.

"Fuck him! Give it to him before there are more," Beatrice spits.

"There's more in the next bunker," Simone says.

"Simone-" Beatrice warns.

"What? Where is there?" he says.

"Where is there more," he says, getting more violent.

"Nowhere. Give him some from the bag!"

Then as if not even a second passes, he grabs me holding the knife to my neck. My heart stops.

Ras tries to walk closer to me before the knife goes deeper. Beatrice stops him before he gets any closer.

"Hey. Let her go! Let her go!" Lea says frantically. I start to pant as I shed a tear.

"Now tell me where to find more food!" he says, pulling me closer to him. He smells like a sewer as I take quick breaths, trying to filter out the disgusting smell.

Beatrice steps closer trying to calm the man.

"Please... let her go," she says.

"No. No," Ras says, looking to his sister for some kind of guidance. He started to tear up in frustration.

"I-," I try to say something. Anything but my throat is being choked.

"Where is the food! Do you want me to cut her," he says, repositioning his knife for a more deadly kill.

"Please, just...Let her go," Simone cries.

I close my eyes briefly, trying to slow my heart even by the littlest bit, but it just causes me to feel a little light-headed.

"Let her go! Go on! Let her go," I hear a voice say. The man still holding me turns around to see who the mysterious person is. I open my eyes to see it's... Martin. For the first time since I met him, I actually smiled at him _. I know right._

"Move away. Now," he persisted, facing his gun at the man.

"Okay," he says, scared.

"Get back. Step away," Martin says cocking his gun.

"R-relax"

Martin looks me in my teary eyes.

"Kai, come here," he says.

The man slowly lets me go.

"Come on. Step away," I cautiously try to get free.

"Come on. Come to me. I'm gonna count to three. One... two...," he says as I was almost free.

Then as if in slow motion, the man stabs me. I let out a blood screeching scream as pain spikes my whole body. I continue to scream, not knowing what's going on around me. I fall to the ground, the pain getting worst and worst as I cried. I could hear bits in pieces of what the group was saying.

"Martin, do something," I heard, I think Simone say, but again I was screaming in agony.

"Easy. Focus! Focus! Breathe"

I start to sob as I try to get up slightly, looking at my wound. The blood gushed out as I slammed my head on the ground screaming louder.

The items in the store began the rumble the longer I was in pain. It was as if a mini storm was in the building, making things worst. I tried to breathe, but every breath hurt.

"Breathe. Hey. It'll be fine," Martin said.

I felt things start to go on my wound as I cried harder in pain. The items in the store began to float. Before it became noticeable, I felt a hand on my arm. I took short breaths as I looked at the person. _Ras_.

I continued to cry but tried to talk," R-ras... it hurts. It hurts so...bad."

"I know. I know but it'll get better soon. It will just keep breathing," he said calmly.

The gauze or whatever the hell they were putting on me got tighter making me whimper before screaming again.

"If you don't be quiet there will be more. So shut up!" Martin yelled as they started doing something I didn't know what.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


I feel myself being driven somewhere but not in a car. More like, I think, a cart.

As you would have guessed, yes. Yes, I'm still yelling in pain.

I now feel a substance. I think it's grass.

"It's here. Right here," I hear through my yells.

I continue to yell as I'm lifted.

"Make her shut up," I hear from Martin. _Easy for you to say._

After a few moments of them carrying me, something bumps my wound. I yell harder.

"It hurts!" I groan.

"The kid has to shut the fuck up," Martin says.

"Kai," Simone addresses me as I wail.

"Stop! Stop!" I say as Martin dresses my wound.

"Swallow this, it'll make you feel better," she instructs over me.

She gives me the pill as I struggle to swallow, only stopping my yelling for a few short moments.

I can feel that I'm sweating, and my hair feels like it's messy.

"Okay, I'm dressing your wound Kai," Martin says as he continues, and Simone gives me some water.

"Ohhh, my god," I wail.

"There there easy," Ras says, me now realizing that he was beside me the whole time.

"It will be fine. There there," Simone says as one of them pats my hair.

"I'm sorry Kai. I should have been there to protect you," they say. I think it's Ras.

I feel someone hug me as I slip in and out of consciousness.

I gasp as I hear people talking, not knowing who it is.

"I'll stay with her. You guys should get some sleep."

"Thanks but I'm not going anywhere."

"Ras. Don't-"

"I said I'm not going anywhere. This was my fault."

"I'll take care of you. We're in this together," I hear, I think Beatrice say to me. I smile slightly before I let myself fall under.


	15. after hours

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽   
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
 **CHAPTER TWELVE** ━━ after hours

_Your thoughts corrupt reality_   
  
  


**THEY SAY WHEN YOU EXPERIENCE** an extreme amount of pain, you start to feel in a daze.Like I'm everything around, you get dizzy, and you can't focus. You begin to sweat a lot, and even though you still feel the aching from it, you still feel numb somehow.

I've been waking up in the middle of the night a lot these past one or two days. I wake just to stare at the ceiling because if I move even by the slightest, I feel the sharp ache in my stomach area.

I stare for hours thinking, which isn't the best idea since I tend to overthink a lot. But the thoughts just keep coming more forcefully without me trying.

_Why are they dragging me around? Wouldn't it be so much easier to leave me? All of these people have known each other for a long time. Ras and Simone. Martin, Patrick, Beatrice, Lea, and Jean. These groups have been through thick and thin together. I'm just a drag onto them, aren't I?_

I shed a few tears from not only my harsh thoughts, but because the pain from my wound is coming back.

I try to sit slightly, biting my lip hard when I bumped my wound. I looked across the room to see the medical cart with the few aid supplies we had on it. It looked so far away, but that could just be me with my woozy mind still acting up.

I sat there for a second, looking at the person still sleeping beside me. I patted his strawberry blonde curls and smiled at his peaceful sleeping expression.

He looks so innocent when he slept. _Beautifully innocent. Something I didn't deserve, yet he was here._

Every night since the incident, Ras has slept here beside me. In a nearby chair, of course. Simone and Beatrice had tried to tell him multiple times to go to an actual bed, but he refused. Even when I insisted, he still refused.

Shaking my head, I placed my hands at my side, pushing myself up only to come crashing back on the table in a huff. _I guess I still haven't regained my strength._ This resulted in me letting out a groan.

I close my eyes, breathing quick breaths as I bit back the tears and tried again.

"Stop," he said, grabbing my wrist. My breath sharpens at the sudden contact before looking at him.

His eyes looked tired, but I couldn't see their beautiful color because of the low lighting. I felt as though I wasn't in the right headspace because I would never stare this long.

I don't know it was because of him or my exhaustion. I fell forward all of a sudden, him catching me instantly. I blinked fast, trying to regulate my mind.

He lowered me back onto the bed carefully after seeing me wince a couple of times. I stared up at him again.

"Why are you up," he asked, his face above mine.

"I- I started to feel the pain again and thought I could get the morphine myself."

I looked away from his intense gaze.

"I guess not."

He pulled my eyes back to his.

"You could have always asked me," he smiled before straightening his face.

"I don't want you straining yourself. It'll prolong your recovery," he said before getting up heading to, I assume, the medical cart.

I sarcastically chuckled, "Like that's gonna happen."

He turned around while he searched the cart.

"Why do you say that?" he frowned.

I hated seeing him upset, so I brushed it off.

"Oh- nothing," I said.

He walked towards the table I was on after he found what I needed and brought water as well.

He gave me the pill waiting a second before giving me the water.

He sat back in his chair, pulling it closer to me. I gazed at him.

"Kai, you know you can tell me anything right," he asked softly.

I sat silently for a second, contemplating telling him the truth. I feared I'd hurt him more than I hurt myself.

"I don't want to hurt you," I whispered, facing the ceiling.

He again made me face him, but this time our faces only inches apart.

"You could never hurt me, K," he said quietly, glancing at something below my eyes.

"You just called me K," I smiled.

"You gave me a nickname. It's only fair I return the favor," he grinned.

I rolled my eyes playfully before focusing back on the topic.

I sighed, "You don't know this but I've haven't been sleeping the best." I looked back into his eyes, " I've been having nightmares. And-and there so dark." I tear up, "There are so many people. Innocent people dead. And there's blood everywhere- "

I stopped and focused on the wall behind him, "The thing is that didn't scare me the most it was that I was the cause of it. I saw myself but I didn't look like myself. I looked empty... Soulless. I don't know what's wrong with me..."

I frown, getting heated, "Why can't I be normal. All my life I've been a freak. When I was sick and now with these dreams."

I calmed down slightly, " To top it off, I feel like a drag onto everyone here. All I do is make things more complicated. You guys are trying to find your father and I'm slowing you down. I shouldn't be here. I should of-"

I let tears stream down my face as I squeezed my eyes tight. I felt hands rub at my face wiping away my tears as I open my eyes.

He looked at me with a calm gaze he wore so well. I felt my heartache.

"Listen to me and listen good. You are not a drag onto us. Any of us. We are a family now. Kai, you are one of the strongest and kindest people I know. You-saved me when it mattered most. There's nothing wrong with you. You have been so good to me. The way that you make me laugh is one of the best feelings in the world."

He smiles before grabbing my hand, "And yes we are trying to find Dad but so are you. You need to stop being hard on yourself. Your amazing and I-"

He stopped coming closer, "I want you here."

My heart stopped as I thought about everything he said. And also the fact he was very close to my lips. I started to internally panic, probably because I never experienced anything like this. I didn't want to assume anything, so I just froze.

He was still looking below my eyes before moving closer to me. I closed my eyes, waiting for whatever he was going to do.

That's when I felt a single kiss on my forehead.

"Goodnight K," he smiled.

I gave a small one back, "Goodnight Ras."


	16. heartbeat

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽  
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
 **CHAPTER THIRTEEN** ━━ heartbeat

_These feelings of mine are totally diverging, one moment I am happy the next I am so sad_

— _maria bastida_  
  
  
  
  
  


 **I BREATHE SHARPLY AND TAKE SHORT, PAINFUL BREATHS.** My hair laid matted to my head with sweat as it cascaded across the table. My head banged, and my mind was still fuzzy, especially after what happened last night.

_I can't believe that this boy kissed me. Well, on the forehead, but that's something, right? Please tell me I didn't imagine it. What did he mean by it? Was it a friendly "I think of you as a sister" kind of kiss or more?_

I put a hand on my head, trying to discard my thoughts. I looked up to see Simone standing by my table. _Was she there the whole time?_

"Good morning, Kai. Um, how are you feeling?" she asked with a hesitant smile.

I gave her a small smile in return, "I think I'm doing a little better."

She studied my face seeing constant sweat and twitching. She slowly lifted my shirt, eyeing my wound.

From the sudden moment, even that small, I flinched.

"Don't tell the others, or they won't bring us along..," I paused.

"And don't tell Ras. I don't want him to worry," I looked down in embarrassment.

She gave me a small glance before pulling the bandage a little. I saw the blood still gushing out before I had to look away in fear of making myself even sicker.

I took a big breath, " It- it hurts."

"Shit!," she says, throwing her hands.

"Is it that bad?," I asked.

"Yes. You need a doctor," she said, grabbing a bag of something.

"I have some morphine," she put a pill into my mouth.

I heard the door open suddenly, freighting me and making me cover up my wound quickly despite it hurting like bitch.

I looked up to see it was Beatrice.

"Hey, it just me," she said, smiling a little.

"Are you thirsty?," she asked, and I nodded.

She circled the table bringing her canister before Ras came into the room. I assume that he left to freshen up. As she gave me the water, I saw the look on his face. I thought it was of concern, but that wasn't all. I saw something else in his eyes that I couldn't decipher. I hated him seeing me this way. _Weak._

"Thank you," I said, putting my hand on her arm in appreciation.

"I don't know how we're gonna cross," Martin said, entering the room.

"The Øresund Bridge is the only way. It's too risky to walk across." Ras came and sat next to me, patting my hair as Beatrice held my hand. I feel a little calmer.

Martin continued, "We'll be exposed, with nowhere to hide."

"Yes, but it's our only option," Simone persisted.

"Martin, she needs that doctor," she says, glancing at me. I feel my heart burn in confusion. _I don't know if I feel like a burden or loved._ I take a breath and glance at Ras. _Remember his words._

 _"_ Help us get across," she said, looking at Martin with hope gleaming across her face.

"Your pretty pale girlie," Beatrice jokes around.

Ras joined in, " Yeah, you look like Rocky off that show you said you used to like. I think it was BFDI?"

I chuckled at their attempt at making me feel better. _Is this what's it like to have friends?_

When I opened my eyes, I saw Beatrice and Ras staring at each other and still giggling.

Before I could even decipher how I felt about it, I saw Martin eying Beatrice with.. _jealousy_ , I think.

I frowned not only at Martin but the whole situation. _Why did it seem that Martin was... jealous?_

 _"_ Okay, we'll wrap up warm and cross in the dark," Martin concluded.

"Hey! Hello? We're busy here," Martin said to Beatrice, annoyed at them playing around.

Beatrice looked at me and Ras, "So are we."

 _"_ Okay, doing what?"

"Nothing."

"No, Okay we'll cross tonight. Are you up for it?"

I blinked a couple of times, wondering if he was talking to me. When there was a moment of silence, then I knew.

"Um, yeah I guess so," I said without an ounce of confidence. _If I could barely get up last night, how am I going to walk for miles?_

"Good," he said, looking at Beatrice.

"Beatrice, come with me," he said as they exited the room.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


"Okay on the count of three, you try to get up," Ras said, grabbing my arm.

"1..," I said, slightly scared, looking into his eyes.

"2"

"3," I said, pushing myself up with the help of Ras. I grunted as my feet touched the ground as I sunk my teeth in my lip.

I push my long curls back as the pain subsided for a moment. I smiled at myself then at Ras.

"I did it," I said, grabbing his arms, stabilizing me.

"Yeah, you did," he smiled, gazing at me. My smile faltered as I found myself very close to him, lost in his sky blue eyes.

After a few moments, I pulled back my hands using the table to stabilize myself, and the pain returning as I did.

"It still looks like shit," he said.

"Thanks," I sighed jokingly. _Transparent Ras is back, folks._

 _"_ At least it's wrapped around something nice," he mumbled. I frowned. _Yeah, I guess my abs?_

"You liked hearing that don't you?" he teased.

"Of course people do. It's nice to hear compliments," I said, thinking back to my childhood. _Compliments are better than insults._

"I don't know it just feels weird hearing people say nice things to me. Especially from a friend," I said truthfully.

"Good thing there's nothing nice to say," he said.

Instead of answering him, I just looked at him as he tightened the strap around my wound. _He's so confusing._

"Soooo, you and Beatrice," I said, dragging the O.

"Soooo, what about her," he teased back.

"You guys like a thing," I said, fearful of the answer.

"Um, like a couple? I- I don't know."

"Oh, that's cool. Cool," I said, looking down.

He lifted my face with his finger, "Why do you ask?"

I looked at his lips as he looked at mine. I didn't know what to do, so I panicked.

"Ugh- N-nothing. I just thought Beatrice and Martin were like a couple," I said, trying to back up even though there was nowhere to go. My face was burning, but I assume it was from the pain of the wound.

"Well, that's weird because I thought my sister was getting close with Martin," he said.

_He's not wrong; they seem to be getting good at working together. Too good._

"Your not wrong, I think she might like him," I said with a small smile.

_Just how I like someone too._   
  
  


_───_ ･｡ﾟ☆ _: *._ ☽ _.* :_ ☆ﾟ _. ───_  
  
  


_"It'll be the end if this continues. I love her but my baby but you saw what she almost did to that kid!"_

_"You think I don't know this Sten! But what if it affects the treatment? What if she gets sick again and it gets worst? She could die!"_

_"I know but it's the only way. We are doing it tomorrow."_

_I felt nothing but hurt and pain. Like everything was over._

_I cried as I saw my mother try to approach me._

_"Kai," she said, but it sounded like an echo._

_"Kai, baby. It's alright. I'm here mommy's here."_

_I was looking down into a corner, so I didn't see her face._

_After a few moments, I rose from the ground, mayhem still rising in the room._

_I turn around slowly, still whimpering._

_I finally open my eyes, showing that the vibrant hazel color was gone. All was left was darkness._

I start to breathe heavily and begin to squirm. I still had my eyes closed from sleeping, and I didn't want to get up yet. I moved my head to the right of me, putting my head on the person's shoulder there. As soon as I did, they stiffened for a moment before caressing my head and grabbing my hand.

I held it tight for the rest of the ride. I don't know how much farther we had to go, but I guess it's close.

Not long after, the car stopped, and I opened my eyes briefly, seeing Martin leave the vehicle. Ras sat on my right along with Beatrice while Simone sat on my left. I tried to keep my eyes open longer, but I felt sick. I felt worst than previous days, and the nightmares I keep receiving aren't helping.

"Are you okay Kai?" Lea asked. I tried, but I didn't have the strength to answer.

"The doctor should be somewhere around here. Kai, can you hear me? We're here," Simone said.

"K?," Ras tried lightly shaking me. I wished I had to energy to answer, but I just couldn't.

People exited the vehicle as swayed my head. I felt someone pat my head.

"Come on, my friend," Beatrice, I think, said.

I tried to groan, but it didn't come out. The only thing I could do is cuddle closer to the person on my left now. I drowned out most of what was around me.

"Kai"

"Kai, I need you to get up. We have to go."

I squinted my eyes and saw Ras.

I still didn't have much energy, but I pressed through to say very few words.

"Carry... me," I said above a whisper.

I assumed he heard me because, after a few moments, I felt myself being lifted. I squeezed my eyes at the stings that went through my body and griped the person's shirt.

My head banged as I came more conscious as the person carried me. I assumed it was Ras, but when I opened my eyes, I saw Martin. If I wasn't feeling like absolute shit, I would have laughed my ass off.

"Hello?"

"Hello? Anybody here?"

All of a sudden, I hear a gun cocking. This shook me to my core after what happened with that woman we saw in the forest. I opened my eyes wide for a few seconds, wrapping my arms around Martin's neck. I would have thought for him to push them off, but he didn't. He held me closer.

"Stop! Go away!" the woman with the gun yelled.

"I'm sorry, but it's my.... my family... Are you a doctor?" Simone begged, fear lacing her voice.

"I don't know what you mean. Who sent you?"

"I heard it from a man-"

"Where did you get that?"

"We found it?"

"Who are you?"

"We're not going to hurt you. We just need help, and you can help."

"I don't know what you're talking about. Go!"

"We're not leaving," Martin said, walking towards her. I shook not only from the sickness I felt but from fear. The last time this happened, I got stabbed, and the time before a woman died.

"If you can... you'll help."

I came from Martin's shirt and looked at her gun faced toward me.

"What happened," she asked.

"She was stabbed in the stomach. She needs stitches or she'll die."

She pondered for a moment before motioning her head to her right.

"Bring her in," she said, but it sounded more like a demand.

I closed my eyes in relief as Martin carried me to whatever the woman was talking about.

I felt I was being laid down, my anxiety rose.

_Is she going to use a needle? Oh, god, I hate needles._

My breathing picks up as my mind wavers.

After a few minutes, the woman entered the room, along with Simone and Ras.

They talked for a moment, saying something I couldn't comprehend.

Suddenly, I felt a sharp object pierce into my skin. I yelped and started to breathe even faster.

"Wait.. wait. Stop... that hurts," I grunted out, gritting my teeth.

"It's the only way," Simone said.

Ras stood above for a second, grabbing something Simone gave him.

He purses his lips before trying to place a bandanna in my mouth. I tried to shake him off, but he held me in place, forcing it into my mouth. ( this is a place for holy children no heads in the gutter 😂💀)

Every pierce she made, I tried to scream louder, but it only came out as incoherent words. I felt the thread pulling my skin together. I felt things in the room start to shake as the pain increased until I felt a hand on my shoulder. I begin to relax a little, and the items in the room settled.

"Good thing you came to see me, this could have killed her," the woman said as she worked on torturing me for my betterment.

"Will she be okay," Ras spoke.

"Yes, but the wound is deep. We need to take care of her because she lost a lot of blood."

"Have you treated many people?" Simone said, trying to start a conversation.

"I tried to help anyone I can but there aren't that many people left."

She made another deep pierce, and I cried out. Following the outburst, glass shattered in the corner of the room. I whimpered as Ras rubbed my arms and shushing me.

"Do you live here?" Simone continued.

"Only since last year or so. It seems safer now."

"Do you have a family?"

"I used to."

"They died?"

"A husband and two children a little younger than you. The rain took them."

As the silence returned to the room, I tried to concentrate on anything else but the pain.

"Ras," I whispered, taking the cloth out of my mouth finally.

"It's almost over, K. Hold on," he said calmly.

I panted as I tried to stay calm and imagine peaceful things.

The thing is, my whole life has been everything but peaceful.


	17. deceit

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽   
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
 **CHAPTER FOURTEEN** ━━ deceit

_trust no one_   
  
  
  
  


**_SNAKE._ ** _A five lettered word describing, "a long limbless reptile which has no eyelids, a short tail, and jaws that are capable of considerable extension. Some snakes have a venomous bite." It can also be known as a treacherous or deceitful person._

_I've never been a fan of snakes; in fact, I'm terrified of them. But somehow, they have been lingering in my mind. Why do you ask? I don't know._

_I have just been having the strangest revelations about things. Most in the form of terrifying nightmares, but now it's becoming more... real._

_When I was going through the surgery, not that must be earlier today, I kept visualizing snakes. And with that and the dark dreams, I'm starting the develop a bad feeling._

_I don't know what to do with this information and the fact that I feel different. Like I'm evolving._

_Ugh! This probably sounds stupid._

_\- Kai the freak_   
  
  


I close the journal I used to write in a long time ago. Before my life changed forever. When one flips through it, one can see my lost hopes. Hopes of getting out of the hospital routine. Hopes of ordinary life. Or you know... a unicorn. But we both know that only one of those came true.

I sigh before focusing back on the conversation Ras, Simone, and the woman I now know as Ellen were having.

"Where are you headed now?," Ellen said, fixing the tea before bringing it over to us.

I grabbed the mug sipping it before putting it down, fanning my tongue.

"I burnt my tongue," I said with my mouth open facing Ras.

"Close your mouth before bugs fly in," Ras snickered.

"Your so lame," I said with my mouth still open before closing it.

"Er... Norrköping," Simone answered, smirking at our antics.

"Oh, I see."

"What's there?"

"Our dads'"

"Whats your dad doing in Norrköping?"

"He works for Apollon," I spoke up.

Ellen stopped cooking for a second.

"What's your dads' name?," she asked.

"Frederik. Frederik Andersen,"

"Sten Mathieson. W-why do you ask?," I said skeptically.

She stayed silent for a moment before turning around.

"Actually, we're not quite done yet after all," she said, looking at me.

"Hey, I'm sorry lady but I can't take more stitches," I said, eyeing her.

"No. Er... But you do need a tetanus shot."

I groaned in annoyance, laying my head on Simone's shoulder.

"But I hateeeee shots," I whined.

"I haven't got it here, but it's close by," Ellen said, ignoring my childish response.

"That's really nice of you," Simone said in a much more mature manner than me.

She blew out the candles lighting the room before they started walking outside.

I folded my hands across my chest as Ras stood in front of me. He looked me in the eye with a smirk.

"Nope," I said, turning away from him.

"Come on, everyone's worried about you and want to see if your okay."

My demeanor falters slightly.

"But-but a shot," I said, sticking out my lip.

"If you don't come on," he said, coming closer.

"I'll have to make you," he bent down in front of me.

I gulped before putting on eyes of determination.

"Try it," I said, looking him up and down.

_Now before we continue and find out what happened after that iconic line by yours truly. I'd like to say that if I had my full strength, I would have kicked his ass. Now that we have that established back to the program._

So, this retard commenced in picking me up and throwing me over his shoulder.

_Ooo, if looks could kill._

I banged on his broad...muscular... _focus Kai_ back.

I glared down as we walked outside to the others.

I don't know how, but I just _knew_ he had a stupid smile on his face.

He put me down, resulting in me popping him in the back of the head. He rubbed the spot. _Still got it._

"Your better now," Beatrice said, smiling.

I walked, more or less lipping, to her before hugging her tight.

"Yes, I am. And now I can get back to kicking people's ass," I said, glaring at the strawberry blonde boy.

"Let's get going, then," she replied.

"Kai just needs a shot," Simone announced to the group.

"Whatttt no... no I don't," I said, looking away nervously.

"Do I need to carry you again," Ras said playfully.

"Only if you want to lose a finger," I smiled sweetly.

"You can stay here. Have some tea inside," Ellen said. _I forgot she was here._

I sighed before lipping very slowly behind her.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


After walking for a while, we approached a hill leading to the place.

"Over here," she said, sliding down the hill.

"Careful," Simone said as Ras helped me down the hill, preventing me from falling.

"What is this place," Simone asked.

Ellen walked up to something looking like a scanner. _That looks just the one from the bunker._

She places her hand on it, resulting in a beeping noise.

I looked at Simone in shock.

_I knew that she knew something. But what?_

"You have access to that," Simone said, voicing my thoughts as she approached her.

I came forward, looking at the scanner.

_Access granted_ **_Johansson division 45_ **

"You work for Apollon," I said more like a statement than a question.

"I used to," she said.

"Did you know our dad?" Ras asked.

"I didn't know an Andersen. But I knew of Mathieson. We all knew about Matheison," she said.

"But you must know of an Andersen. He was one of the first employed," Simone said desperately.

"I didn't know your dad," she said, looking at the siblings.

"But you knew of mine. What about him?" I asked.

"He has his ways, I guess I could say," she said, looking at me for a moment before looking away.

"W-wait, What do you mean?" I asked. _My father would never have. Would he?_

"He did something horrid, and I don't like to speak about it"

"But-"

"That's all I know. Okay?" she said, probably fed up of us pestering her before she went in.

I sighed doing the same.

As we walked down the halls, I noticed it looked the same as the other bunkers.

"Is it too late to turn back," I asked, whispering.

"Why did they build the barracks and everything around them?" Simone asked as we waited for her to grab her supplies.

"Yeah, they're used by the patrols," she said, not even looking at us.

"The Strangers?" she asked, making Ras and I look at her.

Ellen didn't answer; instead, she pulled on her gloves. She gave me a small smile.

"Sit down," she said.

I looked at the siblings with a look of uncertainty before giving in and limping to the table.

As I sat down, I saw the rampant confusion take over Simone's face.

"W-what were the Strangers doing here?" she persisted, stumbling on her words.

As Ellen started to help me settle down, the bad aurora grew, and I felt like it was starting to choke me.

I looked at Simone start to look around her like she realized it too.

Ellen started to strap my hands into restraints as Simone finally turned around, looking at me. I tried to force myself to move and do something before we were all fucked, but I was too late.

My eyes bucked as I looked at the siblings in panic.

"This is just to keep you still," Ellen said like it was normal.

"Wait, what the hell do you mean?" I said, pulling the straps.

I looked at the siblings, still on high alert at this whole situation.

_I don't trust this bitch giving me anything anymore._

Simone looked like she was trying to figure out what the hell was going on. Ras look like he was battling what to do. Let the woman help me or get us the fuck out of there. Honestly, I had the same question.

"Division 45," Simone said, still looking like she was thinking a million thoughts a minute.

"Yes. What about it?" Ellen said.

"It was on the access screen when we entered the bunker."

"Simone... Ras," I said, pulling at the straps more and more. _This looked like the minute before everything goes to shit in a horror movie._

"My dad worked there and-" she said before Ellen punched in a button on the door.

The door slammed shut, leaving Ras outside of it.

As soon as it closed, Ellen started to choke Simone.

I frantically tried to free myself from the restraints.

"Your father killed my children," she said as I screamed.

"Simone! Let her go!" I yelled as the banging from the metal doors grew louder, and my temper rising.

"I don't know what you want or who you think we are-," Simone said.

"You know it's both your father's that did this," she said, ignoring her.

"What are you talking about?"

She lifted the syringe while she talked.

"I told them it was dangerous; you can't attack nature and not expect it to strike back, but they wouldn't listen. Neither him, nor Sten. They wouldn't listen. He's the one who killed my children," she ranted, looking at Simone.

"Look, I don't know what the hell you are talking about. This doesn't have anything to with us. I'm just a kid, and... I don't wanna die," I cried.

"My children didn't want to die either," she spat.

I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself.

"This has everything to do with you. If your father wasn't so blind by discovery, you might not be here. I can't believe you do t know what he did, unless," she stopped, filling the syringe and flicking it.

"Look, there must be a mistake my dad wouldn't kill anyone," Simone said, pulling the zip-ties as Ellen approached me. I shed a tear, a thing I did very often these days, as she prepared my neck. The bangs got quieter, and I heard slight whimpers.

"You have no idea what your dad is capable of," she said as I stared at the syringe near my neck.

Things started to shake in the room as the tension rose.

"No. No," Simone said, getting louder.

"I want them to see what I'm going to do to you," she said, getting in my face rubbing my cheek.

My blood boiled as I spat in her face resulting in her slapping me.

"No... you won't get out of here," she said, walking over to a tablet trying to set it up.

Suddenly the tablet cracked, sending it to tumble to the floor.

I glared at her as she looked at me. I could no longer see Simone because she was standing in front of her.

She looked at me in pure terror before picking up the tablet and trying to position it again. The tablet still worked surprisingly.

"It's going to hurt... but it will end quickly," she said only that her voice shook a little.

"What are you doing this," Simone asked.

"You don't know what it feels like to be lonely," she said.

"But I do," I said as she looked at me, my demeanor becoming softer.

"You don't know anything about us. Anything about me or anything I've been through, I said, my voice cracking.

"You can't kill us," Simone cries.

"What gives you the right," I backed her up.

"You don't know anything. Especially you, Kai," she said, looking at me.

"No matter what you think our fathers' have done.. we haven't done anything," Simone said, her voice cracking. Her syringe neared my neck as I started to shake.

"Lie still!" she yelled. My patience was growing low as fear and anger grew inside me.

"And your children... I understand. I know how much it hurts. Our mothers are dead," Simone said as she tried to convince Ellen. The syringe almost entered my neck as she stopped.

At that moment, the lights shut off, leaving the room in darkness. I opened my eyes, welcoming it in. I looked at Ellen beside me, trying to shove the needle in my neck before I shot my hand up. I couldn't really see or differentiate what happened next.

I heard gunshots but also the sound of a neck snapping.

Simone screamed.

I loosened the restraints without touching them and rose from the table.

I was surprised because my side didn't hurt anymore, but my heart did.

I felt everything good had left my body.

Suddenly the double doors flew open.

"That's how we do from now on. No more talk. Let's go," Patrick said as the lights slowly came on.

As soon as my eyes landed on Ras tear-stained face, I felt my eyes become lighter. I felt like I just snapped out of something...scary.

My side's pain returned. I limped towards him, hugging him before crying into his chest.

"She-she," I tried talking but couldn't get any more words out.

"I tried breaking the door down, but-but it was too thick. Then Martin and the came group, and the power went out," Ras said, caressing my back.

Martin cut Simone restraints as she looked at me with a face filled with mixed emotions.

As we looked into each other's eyes, we connected. We both weren't sure what the hell just happened.  
  
  


─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───  
  
  


**Minutes earlier...**

**3rd Person POV**

Simone pulled with all her might trying to release herself and save the girl she now thought of like a daughter or sister. She still heard the shouts and banging on the thick steel doors of her brother trying to save them.

"No matter what you think our fathers' have done.. we haven't done anything," Simone said, her voice cracking. The syringe neared Kai's neck as the girl started to shake.

"Lie still!," Ellen yelled.

"And your children.. I understand. I know how much it hurts. Our mothers dead too," Simone said as she tried to convince Ellen. The syringe almost entered Kai's neck as she stopped.

As in an instant, the lights in the room went out.

Ellen panicked, trying to shove the needle into the girl before an invisible force stopped her making her drop it.

Ellen stiffened as she lost control of her body, having to give in.

She couldn't see much the aurora of what she saw scared her for the rest of her few seconds of life.

In seconds, her neck was snapped, and gunshots followed shortly after.

Simone rose from the floor, slowly approaching the now dead Ellen shock emitting from her face

"Simone. Simone, damn it!"

She grabbed the syringe that almost killed the smaller curly-headed girl sliding it into her pocket.

She turned around to leave before looking at the dead body again.

She saw nearly no blood on the floor. She looked to the outer edge of the room, bending down. She picked up the bullet inspecting it. It wasn't covered in blood in the slightest.

Ellen didn't die from being shot by Patrick.


	18. strong

･ ｡ﾟ✧: *.☽   
⊱ ──── 《∘◦ 𝐒𝐊𝐘𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄 ◦∘》 ──── ⊰  
 **CHAPTER FIFTEEN** ━━ strong

_"Is it so wrong, That you make me strong"_

━ _one direction_  
  
  
  


 **AFTER THE WHOLE ORDEAL** back at Mack Crazy Pants lab, we ran to an abandoned barn of sorts. On the way there, I fell and tripped a few times, but luckily Bea helped me up. Even though my wound doesn't hurt that much anymore, I was still kinda weak. _I probably just need a week before I'm back to normal._

It's been about an hour since we got here, and nobody has really said anything. We all sat in a circle next to a fire.

**_Order of how they are sitting_ **

Patrick➝ Martin ➝ Simone ➝ Ras ➝ Kai ➝ Lea ➝ Beatrice

Everyone looks torn, especially Lea, because Jean might possibly be dead. I tried to comfort her by sitting closer and putting my head on her shoulder. Even though I could see the brokenness on her face, she still gave me a small smile of appreciation. I don't know why but I just feel he's still out there. I hope that wherever he is, he comes back. I know we weren't really close, but he was a fun guy to hang out with. He made me laugh more than I had in years. Lea doesn't deserve this.

I think this has brought all of us even closer and made me rethink how I view our group.

Lea is a loving, caring person. I've seen how inviting she is with the siblings and I and how she truly cares for the group. Her faith in her religion is inspiring since when I was little, I was religious. Even now, when we believe Jean is dead, she prays.

Martin, even though he was a huge ass initially (kinda still is), he's a good leader. I'm surprised that he hasn't kicked us out yet. He did help me when I got stabbed as well. In a way, I feel indebted to him. He's shown that he's brave and loyal to the people on his good side. I wonder if that includes me now.

Patrick is the one I'm not sure I'll ever like. Ever since we got here, he has despised us. I believe I'll be okay if I avoid him, but I lowkey think he's hiding something.

Beatrice is is the one I want to get closer to. When she told Ras and me about her past, it made me empathize with her. I know what it feels like to lose your whole family. But I'm lucky enough to have one family member by blood left. And to have found another with the siblings and the group. She helped me out a lot when I was hurt.

I hope to become better friends with her. I guess the reason why I haven't tried is because she might be together with Ras. And I know I have a crush on him, but I won't try to get in the way. I guess, for now, I just hope that he's happy with whoever he chooses. But that still doesn't help my aching heart.

I feel my throat tighten. From the traumatic experiences of my childhood, my dark dreams recently, all the death surrounding me, to all the physical and mental pain, I feel like I'm drowning.

I get up from my seat and start to walk toward the entrance of the barn. It's dark out, and I don't think anyone noticed me leave. They were probably stuck in their heads as well.

I wrap my arms around myself before closing my eyes. After a few shaky breaths, I hear footsteps approach me. Suddenly I feel hands grab my shoulders, startling me.

I open my eyes to find it's Beatrice.

"Bea, I'm a serious scaredy-cat don't do that," I whined lightly, shoving her.

She laughed it off.

"Whatcha doing out here," she asked, shoving her hands in her pocket.

"I just need a minute I guess," I sighed.

It got silent for a minute. My hands start to tense as I start clapping.

"Why are you clapping," she asked, giving me a weird face.

"When my anxiety starts to act up, my hands start to tense up. It's been like this since I was a child," I said, my throat clenching from the mention of my childhood.

"Bea"

"Yeah"

I looked down.

"Are w-we friends?"

I looked up, her now facing me before looking forward.

"What do you think," she said.

"I don't know. I'm not really good at having friends. I've never really had them"

"I don't have friends."

"Oh," I said, a little disappointed.

"I have family," she said, looking me in the eye.

I gave her a small smile before looking at the sky. Stars glistened, giving low light to the darkness.

"Family talk to each other right?," I asked nervously.

"I suppose so."

"About anything?"

"Yeah, what's wrong," she said, turning her head.

"I think there's something wrong with me," I said, instantly regretting it.

"W-what do you mean? You look perfectly fine to me."

"I've been having these weird dreams a lot and with everything happening it's really... I don't know scary? I guess." I starting to ramble while walking.

"That's completely normal. We've been through hell. You have been through hell. You're so young. People like you and Rasmus shouldn't have to deal with this shit," she said sternly.

"I just can't help feeling like a drag to everyone sometimes," I whispered, tears spilling out before I quickly wipe them away.

"Your one of us now. And we're not- I'm not gonna let anyone hurt you," she said, caressing my tear-stained face.

"But you can't promise that. Any of you could die. Like Jean," I pressed my eyes closed.

"I know but if we stick together we'll make it through. As for the dreams, I'm sure they are nothing," she said, pulling me into a hug.

I took in shaky breaths cursing myself for being so weak.

Though I'm weak, my family make me strong.


End file.
